I.miss.you!!

Hello,
Just wanted to share my latest in "baby drama". Actually, the baby is absolutely fine, although last week, it was me who was miserable. I called my OB office b/c on Wed. evening, I started having braxton-hicks or what I felt as tightening across my belly. It was almost like I was sucker-punched and the wind was knocked out of me. I was in Bismarck, and felt that way almost all the way home. Dh & I thought that it was just my body reminding me to slow down & rest more. However, the next day at school, I was having those same feelings again, but more frequently, especially when I would be escorting my class around campus (which I do all to frequently). Our school isn't self-contained or in one building. Everything is in another building and it sucks on those cold, icy, chilly days.
Anyway, that afternoon, I called my OB office and told them that lately I am extremely thirsty, feeling dehydrated ALOT and when I go to the bathroom, not a lot comes out and sometimes, I have a burning sensation (TMI) afterwards. I also mentioned the belly tightening and was curious if that was a sign of dehydration, exhaustion, signs of GD, bladder infection, and more importantly, is my baby ok.
Well, my OB was not in her office that day, but the on-call doc said to rest this evening, push more fluids and to go in and see my regular OB the next day.
So, Friday afternoon, I rush out of school, pick up all three little ones and we zoom like he!! to Bismarck to make a 4:30 appt. I was still having those tummy tugs but they were a bit better when I put my feet up.
I meet dh there at my clinic & exchange places w/ him and run in to my appt. This rushing around is causing my tummy to really be active and tighten up more and more. As soon as I get in, I pee in the cup and get weighed. I couldn't believe it, I lost 3 more pounds. I started in October at 214, in December I was 210, and in Jan, 207.
Anyway, when my dr came in, she listened to me, and then when I was done talking, she flat out said, there is nothing I can do for that. It is just a symptom of pregnancy and a pain that I have to deal with. I was just floored. She said it in a tone that said, this is what it means to be pregnant. So, I asked, "So, you mean, I'm here for nothing?" and she said, "Well, since you're here, lets listen to baby & do all that so you don't have to come back on Wednesday". I was so upset and frustrated. She never once acknowledged my fears of an infection, GD, exhaustion. I asked about what does this all mean. She said, "Well, if pregnancy is too much for you right now, maybe you'll have to quit working."
Anyway, it didn't get any better except to have me in tears, on the table while she measured me and found the baby's heartbeat. I was so frustrated. It wasn't until she say me crying that she found a tiny piece of sympathy to say, "Maybe this weekend, you should try to put up your feet and relax your body, if you can help it".
Needless to say, I'm not going back to her office, if I can help it. I refuse to have a negative person like that in my delivery room, during the most happy time for me.
Ok, thanks for listening Steph!
Theresa

Hi Stephanie,
How are you doing?
We're doing well. I can't believe that October is almost gone and before we know it, we'll be celebrating 4 y.o. birthdays!!!
I just wanted you to know that I'm thinking of you and your beautiful family. We don't make trips to Williston anymore, since they (MIL) sold their house. They moved into a 1 bedroom apartment downtown somewhere. No room for grandkids anymore.
Anyway, Hi to Chuck, Charlie, Hope and Alex. Your in my thoughts.
theresa

Stephanie!!! I just read your blog and saw that Hope cut her hair!!!! Oh my.....my Gracie whacked hers off real good when she was three. I know that "about to puke" feeling that you get. ESPECIALLY when she is your ONLY girl here!! She is still the cutest thing on earth!!

Hey Stef, that post about your loss of Ruthie is a beautiful tender heartbreaking post.
Thank you so much for the honor of reading it!!!
You are so sweet to share....and yes, as a BTDT mom, my heart hurts for you....for the empty spot that can never be filled.
HUGS!!!
thanks for sharing!!!

Hey Stephanie. I just published something that I've been working on for a long time. I wanted to post the story of my loss on my blog......but it took me so long to finish the story. Anyway...if you want to check it out I'd love to have you read it.

loadoffmymind.blogspot.com
the name of it is simply "loss"

Thanks for being a supportive BTDT Mom. I know it seems like forever ago that it happened to me, but I think you know how long it can take to really process grief.

Thanks!
Stef