dispatchmomma

drained..... thats it, just drained. The girls had a visit with their mother... my sister on Friday and it was hard on all involved. She is my sister and at one time my best friend we have been to hell and back times a million together, through things that no one but each other can even begin to understand. I ache all over to see her hurt so much. I m not sure I have ever experienced such emotional pain in my life. Watching her have to hand her children back over and knowing she won't have Christmas...

So, I go back and forth between sad for her and just down right pissed at her. I am sad for her because I can not fathom the turn her life has taken and the choices she is making because I think she must be miswired somewhere... then I am pissed because she is putting them throught the same crap we went through as children, the choices she makes seem to be more about what she wants and not about her kids at all. I just don't get it. We used to sit and talk about the choices we would make for our...

Jess has been a real trooper, she is my hero right now. She is sharing her room and all of her stuff as well as her mommy and she is being such an adult about it. I know it is hard for her but she doesn't say anything. I am hoping to plan a day out for her and I after Christmas so I can she her just how special I think she is. The girls need so much attention and time, and before they were there I was always available for Jess at her whim and that is just not the case anymore so I need to have that...

Oh my where to even start today.......

So the house is full... no make that overflowing, but it feels cozy and great. I finally started my christmas shopping, not much this year but the kids will all be happy. I have to say I have been so amazed at the kindness of others this holiday season. Getting the girls was an absolute blessing but it was still hard to fit all they would need in a budget that is already bursting at the seams. So many have reached out and assisted with clothing...