Hi ladies, it's nice to see some action on this board. My name is Sarah (36), mom to Soloman (14), Karsen(5) & Sinclair (5). I've been single basically forever. Soloman's dad hasnt seen him since he was 7 & the twins dad hasnt seen them since they were 2. I have never received any support from Soloman's dad. I have a court order that the twins dad is supposed to pay me $1200 a month, but it's really a joke. The second the courts find him he just quits his job. Truthfully I could careless...I make a decent wage so we are all ok. As you can see by my name we are a baseball family so we spend most of our days and nights at the baseball field. My oldest is a freshman in high school and the twins are in kindergarden. Karsen has some learning delays so he will be repeating Kinder next year....Sinclair is ok to move on to 1st, but being the are both very young kindergardeners I'm 75% sure I will be holding her back to.

Sorry about my old siggy....i just keep forgetting to download new pics to update it.

I look forward to getting to know you all.....

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Hi and Welcome Sarah,

It's almost 3 am and I'm awake due to tummy issues anyhow so anyways my name is traci single mom to brendan he is 3 and his dad sees brendan once a year,pays once a month..we live on a 'small income so we are poor but we survive,

You got gorgeous kids

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Traci
Mommy to Brendan August 4, 2004


My angels in my heart forever and in my father(8-26-87) loving arms Alizah 6-18-02 Trey Feb 2003 surrounded by my 2 guinea pigs Felecia feb 9 2003 and patchy 6/2004








Brendan and Blackie

Hi,

I held my 8 year old back in 1st grade she has a late summer birthday. I am so glad we did. That is great that you are so independant I hope to be someday. My kids dad sees them when he decides it is good for him. I am trying to get a regular schedule but I dont see that happeneing. As far as money some days we have it and somedays we dont. My DH is fighting me every step of the way on everything. I will be glad when this is finally over and I can move on.

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Thanks for the welcome girls.....

Even though I have a ok job....I'm still poor, but the bills are paid and we have what we need...and even a few things we want, but dont really need. So I know exactly what you two mean. My biggest issue money wise was always my daycare...especially with twins. Luckily they are in school and cost is MUCH cheapier. I will just be happy when I dont have any daycare costs.

Question for you both....did your kid(s) dad have a good dad? In both my cases neither had a father that was around consistently. I dont consider that an excuse to being a bad father, but it seems to be a cycle that these "men" need to break. I have heard every excuse from both of them....but it boils down to they both blame ME for them not being good fathers....is that laughable or what. Luckily I dont have to deal with either one any more, since neither have been in contact in so long. LOSERS!

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when brendan was born his dad was just a shadow I woke up after i realized he didn't care for my boys health he had his 5 month vaxes i think the dtap made him have severe pain and a way high fever I said mark i can't find the infant tynelol he said have him sweat it out then he fell asleep i found motrin for infants but your not allowed to give that til they are 6 months he was 5 and i didn't want himm to suffer so i gave him a 'tiny amount ' his fever dropped and he was able to sleep after that situation so I left his father the month after he came back to visit on thanksgiving we gave into passion it was so hard not too because i spent 3 yrs ttc with him and the dtd was great but I couldn't help feel guilty about it so when he came back a year later oh i was so badly wanted to dtd with but it was lucky I didn't because 2 wks later i got my first pp af when brendan was 2 yrs and 3 months then he bought us tickets to go to dland ,beach, aquarium so last time we saw him was august he gave me huge headache by 'giving me parenting tips' that i snapped in his face didn't help i was having pms swings.

He finally gave brendan 2 xmas present and he sends the child support monthly

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Traci
Mommy to Brendan August 4, 2004


My angels in my heart forever and in my father(8-26-87) loving arms Alizah 6-18-02 Trey Feb 2003 surrounded by my 2 guinea pigs Felecia feb 9 2003 and patchy 6/2004








Brendan and Blackie

My DH is just like his dad who was also an absentee father emotionally, physically and mentally. I am also to blame for his bad father behavior and have to hear it on a weekly basis. I wish I didnt have to deal with him. I think eventually the contact will be less and less as it is now it is only once a week if that. I am a total loser magnet and am trying to make sure I dont make that mistake again.

How do you make sure your boys grow up different? I am so scared my son will be like his dad because of genetics.

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My dad has been a huge influence for my kids. Luckily my dad is a young grandpa, he was only 42 when I had Soloman. He comes to all Soloman's games and is a proud grandpa. He isn't as close with the twins as he is w/ Soloman, but he is still a huge part of their lives. My dad picks all 3 up from school 3-4 times a week so they spend a lot of time with both my parents. It helps to have a strong male figure in their lives....so hopefully you have someone that can fill that void.

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Hi there!

When I was pregnant and the girls were young, I was on the multiples board. Since I left my DH, I have been MIA for the last 2 or 3 years. I have twin 5 year old girls. Their dad lives in Illinois and comes about once a year to see them. I have a court order for child support but he is taking me back to court to see if he could pay less child support (when he pays too little anyway). Even though I STILL live with my parents and am trying to get my feet on the ground (STILL), things are just awesome! The girls are blossoming and we are all totally complete. If my signature is still what I think it is......it's really old.

Sarah - it's nice to still see you on here!

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Andrea
Single Mom of Twin five year old girls

Hi Andrea...how are you? Of course I remember you.....its so nice to see you. Glad things are working out here in so cal. I think if I lived with my mom we'd kill each other....hehe I had a friend whose X husband took her back to court to lower his child support...and...guess what???? The judge RAISED it! Is that funny or what! Hopefully that happens for you!!! So are you working? I think last we spoke you were going looking for a job. Are the girls in Kindergarten? Anyhow....I hope you stick around here!!!

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welcome here andrea i did live with my mom from feb too july and we were ready to kill each other so that was before b was even one .who's now almost 4 btw my name is traci sahm to brendan

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Traci
Mommy to Brendan August 4, 2004


My angels in my heart forever and in my father(8-26-87) loving arms Alizah 6-18-02 Trey Feb 2003 surrounded by my 2 guinea pigs Felecia feb 9 2003 and patchy 6/2004








Brendan and Blackie

Hi guys!

I went to work for a little over a year. I worked from 7:30am to 5:30pm. I couldn't stand leaving the girls in daycare that long, so I quit my job, and am now completing my teaching credential and substitute teaching. This way, I have the same schedule as the girls.

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Andrea
Single Mom of Twin five year old girls

That's super Andrea

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Traci
Mommy to Brendan August 4, 2004


My angels in my heart forever and in my father(8-26-87) loving arms Alizah 6-18-02 Trey Feb 2003 surrounded by my 2 guinea pigs Felecia feb 9 2003 and patchy 6/2004








Brendan and Blackie

Andrea,
That is so great! I'm happy for you. Teaching is such a great job for a single mom....since you can have the same hours as the girls. Its nice you have your parents to help you out while you finish your credentials. What grade do you want to teach? I told you before my oldest friend lives in Corona. Her oldest goes to Centennial and Im not sure what schools the other two go to. Do you want to stay in Corona to teach? Can you sub during the summer? I have a friend here in LB that subs and he cant sub during the summer and is so stressed about $$$$$ with summer less then 2 weeks away. You probably have more oportunities out there because there are many year round school....we are mostly traditional year here. How long before you are finished with your credentials...I know it usually takes a year?

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Hi Sarah,

I finish my credntial in January: one year of classwork, 16 weeks of student teaching it's in Spanish. I start my student teaching in the fall. I work at Norco High School as a resident sub. I did a long term sub there also. Yes, I am freaked out about the summer but I have saved a bit for the girls and I to do little things here and there.

what does your friend teach at Centennial?

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Andrea
Single Mom of Twin five year old girls

Our baseball team just beat Norco last week....my son goes to LB Wilson. My friend doesnt work at Centennial her son is a freshman there. My son is doing horrible in spanish....C- as of today! Im so pissed at him. He is taking sign language next year for his foreign language...since his school is a "classical" high school he has to have 4 years of a foreign language....so sign language it is. Do you like working with high schooler's? Teenagers are such a PAIN IN THE A$$! My son has every excuse in the book...he is a good kid, but a slacker...and does just enough to get buy. Which is a shame since he could be a decent student if he put forth any effort. Anyhow..thats a whole other thread...hehe!!!

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I won't be looking forward to my son's teen years because my almost 4 yr old is not 'caring what I say then when I get to become in 'my serious tone' that i mean buisness if I'm around mom when i'm discipling him it's all wrong and she's against it . I'm like stating my mom is such a 'hypocrite' she had did much more worse discipline to me which btw she forgot or is in denial but why would I make up such a thing. Mom still does the yelling that 'she scares the 'whole waitress even brendan has told her to pipe down and she just laughs at him when he stated that but she & her kiss up friend had to give me a lecture saying my son is going to 'resent me and I will push him away. But mom's yelling excuse is her being assertive. I know my son is more normaler than me but that doesn't mean he will become freewill boy.
For example you would think he would get the 'idea of not to continue to draw, color walls then to add the pudding, and yougurt to the walls . He has done that at least five times every single month.

Then to 'end up continously playing with the 'water' which i tell him when mom is cooking dinner 'you do not touch the water. He did anyways & flooded the whole bathroom .

Then my mom is 'wondering if i'm beating him up and that's why he's acting up and I go no but will 'never admit to her that i do give him a little swat when he does something he's not supposed too but that's also something she's against now but she was the one who had rubber 'scrapers, pancake spatulas, and wooden spoons hidden under the car to 'swat our hands , knees, and she spent so much time slapping our face with her hands, if we talked bad to her soap in our mouth if our toys were out she would rip them apart and she even broke my brother gun over her knee in half a big plastic gun. I actually had to pay my cousin for 2 books that my mom ripped into pieces & no one would believe me. Except when i got into highschool i told some people i was being abused my mom made me say i was lying then finally when i came to school with a hurt hand the 'nurse started to 'realize i was telling the truth. but it was already too late when i was made by mom too look like a liar so I ended up becoming a liar just because i didn't want to get that severe punishment again but of course that continued.

I even told my brother the 'discipline that mom once did to us she is now against & will be saying how 'wrong its for you to do this -when she did much more worse to us it feels like how am I am supposed to do the 'right discipline without having my mom 'accusing me that i'm abusing my own child' btw she's also against attachment parenting and I'm like what am I supposed to do now.

Sometimes I do act ike my mom but when i realize I do I 'admit it and say i apologize to my boy which my mom when she gets into 'her mood swings & lashes out she says its me or her hubby who made her do that 'she never owns her own responsiblity.

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Traci
Mommy to Brendan August 4, 2004


My angels in my heart forever and in my father(8-26-87) loving arms Alizah 6-18-02 Trey Feb 2003 surrounded by my 2 guinea pigs Felecia feb 9 2003 and patchy 6/2004








Brendan and Blackie