opinons needed.....

mieko25 · #1 (**permalink**) 11-21-2007, 10:03 AM

Girls... I need your opinons.. As you know I don't tell my family or many friends about what we go through to TTC. (Well quickly off the subject my grandma and I are close and she has cancer and she has to go in for an outpatient proceduce once a month and I usually take her.) Well this time the outpatient surgery falls on the same day my IUI will most likely be on. I feel bad saying no because now my dad has to take her and he just doesn't do that well emotional seeing his mom going through all this. Last month I couldn't take becasue I had to work. I wouldn't feel so bad just waiting for the next cycle but my last day of meds is tomarrow and the IUI should be Wednesday next week. Last month our first attempt to TTC#2, DH ended up in the ER with kidney stones the day before the IUI. We were lucky he was able to give his sample. Now that the cycle was a BFN he is telling be I told you we shouldn't of done the IUI that day I just gotten out of the hospital, I had to much medication and it probably affected my sample. So what do you guys think I should do? Do you think this is another sign we should skip this month? Sorry about the book! Thanks for listening if you got this far!

Constance_13 · #2 (**permalink**) 11-21-2007, 10:52 AM

Sorry you are having so many challenges with your IUI's. I think it’s very awesome of you to help your family where you can. I also think that as women and caring ppl we tent to help other first and look out for our selves second. I am not saying you are doing this or that it’s a bad thing but generally speaking we tend to put our self LAST on the list if that makes since. When we don't and we actual do things for us we then feel guilty.....such a horrible cycle to be in. I know I do this all the time.... but I also truly believe that we are of no good to anyone else if we are not looking after our self as well.

OK.... stepping down from my soap box.... sorry.....this is just something I have been working on my self and I truly feel we all need to find our balance to be happy in life and we need to be able to do things for our selves and NOT feel guilty about it.

I know this is a hard call but truly follow your heart. Do what is right for you and the rest will fall into place. Maybe make a deal with your dad...say that you have a very important appointment that you cannot miss and if he can do it this time you will do it next time. Or can you maybe meet him after your appointment and take her home? Just some thoughts.

Follow your heart and you will not go wrong and try to make sure you are not last on the list all the time.

Celi · #3 (**permalink**) 11-21-2007, 03:16 PM

It is hard to say something, but I agree with Amanda! Maybe You can just say that you have an important appointment (even tell that is health related) and try to go there to take your Grandmother home... I have a big mouth so I would end up telling the truth to my father and grandmother... but I understand you wanting to keep it a secret...