Having a BAD day....now worried :(

Constance_13 · #1 (**permalink**) 10-02-2007, 08:48 PM

Greetings,

This week has been a bit rough. I have had lots of added stress this week. I am trying to keep it at bay and not worry too much about it but that is not working very well. We got some very bad news, work has been crazy, family politics have reared there ugly heads and my DH has to head back home.

Two out of the four things I knew were coming but add the other two and I feel I am drowning

Since all this added stress my cramps have come back with a vengeance....no spotted thank goodness. I have an appointment first thing tomorrow morning with a doc (not mine as he is away this week

but at least it’s a doc at his office). Out of all the things that are upsetting me this is causing the most stress. I am so worried the baby is not doing well.

I know I know.....I need to relax and not let so many things get to me. I really am trying but to be honest I am so horrible at it. I know the doctor is going to tell me I need to rest and to lower my stress level. I have been trying to do that this evening….I have been relaxing. I had to take some Tylenol and I took a bath to try and help with the cramping. It has taken the edge off but they are still very uncomfortable.

How are you guys dealing with your stress, worry, family complications and other things as they pop up?

Please let everything be ok!!!!

Sorry for venting!!

Haras · #2 (**permalink**) 10-03-2007, 12:19 AM

Not very well, tonight while my mom was leaving to going pick my sister up from university, she nearly ran both me and my daughter over.
Here's what happened...it was 9:37 and she had to be there to pick Stephanie up by 9:45, I live eight mins away. I had asked my dd if she wanted to go get Steph, while she went to go get her coat my mother decided to go with her, when Jace came out of her room and saw that bubbie was gone without her she got upset. I picked up Jace and locked the door, I was not wearing any shoes and carried her to the car. It was dark and my mother was backing up, we were behind the car but over to the side. She did not see us, and nearly hit us. While holding my dd I was yelling mom repeatably to get her attention, finally I hit the car with my hand.
She is mad at me for "running up to the car and nearly getting hit" WTF. Here I am pg, not wearing shoes and carrying my 40 lbs dd...I was not running.The problem is she has trouble seeing at night to drive, and she was not using her review mirrors. She had been doing her laundry over here, but when we got back she was so mad she took her wet laundry put it in a bag is pulled her laundry home (the cart is on wheels), it is a 20 min walk from her house to mine. Though I would share my woes, wonder why my problems seem to center around my mother?

bobandjen · #3 (**permalink**) 10-03-2007, 08:14 AM

Amanda- I am sorry to hear that you have so much stress right now. I hope thing level out soon. Please let us know what the doc says!!

Celi · #4 (**permalink**) 10-03-2007, 12:59 PM

Amanda so sorry read about your bad day

But you really need to try to focus on positive things, I know it is hard, I'm really happy today, but I tend to worry about everything

I will be praying for you!!

Constance_13 · #5 (**permalink**) 10-03-2007, 02:29 PM

First I would like to thank everyone for responding to my other thread and THANK YOU very much for the support. I know allot of my anxiety about my PG is due to the fact that it took 6 years to get here and its my first so I am questioning EVERYTHING my body is doing.

The doctor was so very nice. He went though my chart and asked lots of questions. Examined my tummy and then talked to my DH and I for over 30min about what was happening, the changes the uterus was going though and that 50% of women experience the same thing. It is very common from week 9 to 13 to have some extra camping. He said I was defiantly in the normal range currently and he did not feel I had any red flags raised yet. He graves us very detailed information and told us both what to look for and if they happen I am to come to the office ASAP or go to the hospital if I can not get in. BUT as it stand things are going along just as they should be. He made sure all our questions were answered and he did not rush us at all. He listed to all our concerns and addressed them accordingly. I have to say it was very nice to have that kind of interaction with a doc especially since he was not our regular OB.

BUT....I have to lower my stress. He said number one it’s not good for me but it’s defiantly not good for the baby and my PG. Especial since it seems to be triggering the cramping to happen more the "normal". He did not order me off work BUT highly recommended that over the next few weeks that I take some extra time away from the office and I find stuff to do that will take my mind off everything. When I come home he said I MUST relax and let my DH look after me. He told me that what ever I am feeling the baby is feeling and taking in.....so I really need to work at not letting things get me so upset. This is so much easier said then done. ARG

He did not try the Doppler as he said it may or may not pick up the heart beat and with how anxious I was this morning he did not want to add any more stress. He said at my next appointment they will be able to use it with no challenges and he was not overly concerned cuz we had gotten to hear and see the heart beating at my early U/S. I was very disappointed but it was probity the best choose. My DH said he was happy, as if he could not have picked it up I would have been a wreck.....he knows me too well. BUT still I am disappointed....I was hoping to hear that beautiful little sound to help put my mind at ease.

My DH leaves on Monday - The day after our 1 year wedding anniversary and we have NO clue when we will be able to see each other again

We may even miss spending Christmas together yet again this year. We missed last year (our first married Christmas) and I have to say it was very hard but this year it’s going to be worse. We are doing everything we can to not let it happen but the immigration stuff is taking a LONG LONG LONG time. We have been apart more then together since 6month before we got married. It’s been a very hard year and 1/2 so far. The times apart have been hard as we never know when he will be able to come for another visit. BUT looking back I truly think they were easy compared to what is coming up. I think this time apart is going to be the hardest yet. I know that each day that ticks by stresses me more, and I feel like crying and screaming as I do NOT want to be alone. I am also so very sad that he is going to miss lots of the PG milestones. I just pray that we will hear from the immigration ppl very soon and I will get to have my interview and then they will approve our case so I can go home. THAT would be the best Christmas present EVER!!!

Work and family politics......I am just dealing with what I can the rest I have decided will just have to wait. The bad news we got on the other hand it’s a touphy....my mom has been diagnosed with cervical cancer....she goes for surgery at the end of the month. It’s horrible because my DH's mom was diagnosed with Breast cancer in February of this year and has been going through major treatments. My DH said that our bad luck has spread and that we have cursed our families.....he was trying to make light of it as it been one hell of a year. His mom is sooo young she is only 42 (11 years older then me....LOL....yes my DH is younger then I by 6 years

) and she has the worst kind of cancer....very aggressive....her treatments have been very hard but she is a strong lady and will get though it. My mom is a lot older and has very poor health as it is sooo we are very worried and to be honest do not know what to think about all this. BUT all we can do is wait till the surgery and see what they find and then go from there.

I feel better that the baby is doing well. I am trying my best to let some of the stress go but I am really bad at it. I wish I were better....DH hates how much I worry and stress over everything. He says I take on enough for everyone in the world and I am only one person so I really need to cut back. I am going to really try....I hate feeling like this. (Now I have tears again in my eyes.....grrrrr....dang PG emotions anyways).

Thanks again for listen. The next few months are going to be rough but I will get though them....I just have to find a way!!!

SORRY FOR THE BOOK!!!!

Celi · #6 (**permalink**) 10-03-2007, 03:10 PM

Amanda I'm so happy that you could talk to the doctor and he was able to calm you in some way.

Don't feel bad about questioning everything, I'm the same way, it would be easier if we were not... I'm trying to not focus to much on bad things that can happen, but lets see... On the other hand I'm sorry that you have to go through all this stress right now

I will be praying for you!

nessak · #7 (**permalink**) 10-03-2007, 03:18 PM

I am so sorry you are going through all of this! I really don't know what to say expect I will be praying for and that any time you need to talk to us we are here for you! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!! Do something extra nice for yourself like indulge in some ben and jerry or buy your self something nice sometimes this helps me just a thought!

Loopy Lou · #8 (**permalink**) 10-03-2007, 03:26 PM

Amanda ~ I am so sorry you are going through all of this right now, especially at a time when you should be enjoying your little miracle growing inside....The only advice i could possibly give is do it for the baby, i believe everything happens for a reason, and this baby is your ray of light in all of this grey, draw strength from that, i believe it will make you stronger and get you through anything, also this baby can help your mom and mother in-law by giving them the will to fight the Cancer....I do hope INS gets sorted soon, i have had 10 yrs of dealing with them myself, lots of paper work, lots of hurry up and wait....Remember you and DH will not be parted forever, (i know easier to say, than to feel) But when he is not there he has left a very important part of him with you, remeber that every second of everyday you cannot be together....This baby has come a long for many many reasons and for many people, don't forget that.
Also i am so pleased to hear how wonderful the doctor visit was.

Take care girlie!!!