If you cosleep or coslept with an infant...

Jescafa · #1 (**permalink**) 02-27-2006, 08:05 AM

...did you follow all the guidelines for safe cosleeping? These include:

-always putting baby on her back to sleep
-putting baby adjacent to mom, never between mom and dad
-not letting any siblings older than 9 months sleep in the same bed
-removing all pillows and soft bedding from the bed
-preventing baby from rolling off, either by installing a mesh guardrail or by pushing the bed against the wall and stuffing rolled towels in any spaces
-never cosleeping if you are overly tired or have had alcohol or a sleep aid
-never leaving baby alone in an adult bed

http://www.parenthoodweb.com/article...rticle_id=6612

Whenever I read lists like these, I think--that's a recipe for insomnia for me. I'm sure there are parents who can sleep perfectly happily under the above conditions, but I also know that others are selective about which of these recommendations they follow (I hear it all the time on the boards). So, if you cosleep or coslept with an infant, which of these guidelines did you follow and which didn't you? And why?

Emaline · #2 (**permalink**) 02-27-2006, 08:18 AM

-always putting baby on her back to sleep I certainly try. Teagan will roll over on to her belly though. It has gotten better though, she rarely rolls over that way now.

-putting baby adjacent to mom, never between mom and dad Nope because I feel she is safer between us. We have a king sized bed so there is a hgue amount of space for her to sleep in.

-not letting any siblings older than 9 months sleep in the same bed Yep I follow this one.

-removing all pillows and soft bedding from the bed Nope but they are kept off or away from her.

-preventing baby from rolling off, either by installing a mesh guardrail or by pushing the bed against the wall and stuffing rolled towels in any spaces

See I won't follow this one because when I was growing up a woman across the street from me always put her baby in her bed and pushed the bed against the wall, and stuffed towels in there. Somehow the bed slipped out of place enough for the baby to slide down between the wall and the bed and suffocated. It was horrible. They blamed their 9 y/o daughter (a friend of mine) for not watching the baby closer. It was not her fault at all. I think Teagan is much safer between DH and I.

-never cosleeping if you are overly tired or have had alcohol or a sleep aid Yep I follow this one. I had a friend in from out of town and had a few drinks so I slept on the couch.

-never leaving baby alone in an adult bed Yep I also follow this one.

NovAngel · #3 (**permalink**) 02-27-2006, 08:30 AM

I did not follow all the rules.

I used rolled up towels for a spacer (it also held him in place) or he slept on my chest on his tummy, I never drank or had other kids in the bed and I didn't let him sleep alone. My bed is not against a wall nor did I use a mesh guardrail, didn't remove all pillows/ blankets but kept them away from us..... don't even get me started on sleep deprivation.

I never slept well (and neither did baby or dh) with him in the bed so I eventually stopped it. I was very paranoid about SIDS so I did put him on his back in the crib for a while but he had a hard time sleeping in that position so I eventually (with great hesitation) put him on his tummy and he slept much better but I was a nervous wreck. I never allowed any bedding or stuffed animals in the crib.

I still check to make sure he's breathing and he's 3.

I would do things so much different if I ever had another child, to be honest I was so clueless with this first one that I would just sit and cry for the first few weeks because I was so overwhelmed and lost.

NovAngel · #4 (**permalink**) 02-27-2006, 08:32 AM

See I won't follow this one because when I was growing up a woman across the street from me always put her baby in her bed and pushed the bed against the wall, and stuffed towels in there. Somehow the bed slipped out of place enough for the baby to slide down between the wall and the bed and suffocated. It was horrible.

I was always paranoid about that too, we also have a king size with plenty of room.

Emaline · #5 (**permalink**) 02-27-2006, 08:36 AM

If we had a smaller bed I probably would not co-sleep. We would be too on top of each other for my comfort. I do know families that do, and they do usually only sleep on one side and they do use the mesh guards. At this point we rarely even touch unless it is to nurse. She can sleep with her arms stretched out and not touch either of us. Though she usually sleeps with her arms above her head in the touch down position

When she was a newborn, she usually slept in the crook of my arm, so there was no way I was going to roll over on her because I would have to have broken my own arm to do that.

Emaline · #6 (**permalink**) 02-27-2006, 08:39 AM

I still check to make sure he's breathing and he's 3.

I scared the heck out of Alex not that long ago checking on him

I reached out my hand to put on his belly and his shirt had ridden up and well my hand was cold and scared the hell out of the poor little guy!

Jonesey · #7 (**permalink**) 02-27-2006, 08:42 AM

-always putting baby on her back to sleep yes

-putting baby adjacent to mom, never between mom and dad yes

-not letting any siblings older than 9 months sleep in the same bed no, but I always slept between them when Dd was still co-sleeping

-removing all pillows and soft bedding from the bed I still kept my pillow

-preventing baby from rolling off, either by installing a mesh guardrail or by pushing the bed against the wall and stuffing rolled towels in any spaces Neither of my children ever slept in a crib so I've always used guardrails.

-never cosleeping if you are overly tired or have had alcohol or a sleep aid I didn't drink when they were tiny. And never needed a sleep aid then!

-never leaving baby alone in an adult bed yes

I don't think any of these guidelines are particularly hard to follow. You only have to set the bed up once (same as with a crib) and continue from there. It's never caused me a problem.

deeniereenie · #8 (**permalink**) 02-27-2006, 10:02 AM

always putting baby on her back to sleep
I let Jarrett sleep on his tummy from 2 months on, because he would.not.sleep on his back at all. I kept an eagle eye on him when he was napping, and at night, he slept on his side, in the crook of my arm.

-putting baby adjacent to mom, never between mom and dad
Depended on which breast he nursed on last. If I needed to feed from the left, he went between DH and I. We also have a king sized bed, and DH stayed on his side.

-not letting any siblings older than 9 months sleep in the same bed
Occassionally, Emily would get into bed with me, but she was 9 years old, and again, she stayed away.

-removing all pillows and soft bedding from the bed
Kept my pillow

-preventing baby from rolling off, either by installing a mesh guardrail or by pushing the bed against the wall and stuffing rolled towels in any spaces
Wasn't an issue, if he was in the middle he wasn't going to roll off, and if he was on the side, he was against my body, far from the edge, and I woke up every time he moved.

-never cosleeping if you are overly tired or have had alcohol or a sleep aid
What new parent isn't overly tired? I didn't use alcohol or sleep aids, never needed those.

-never leaving baby alone in an adult bed
Nope. Jarrett napped in his crib, or in the bassinet, but mostly in my arms.