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05-13-2008, 07:25 AM
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SKGuru
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Elmira, Oregon, USA
Posts: 631
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Re: Chatty Thread!
Originally Posted by carriemb
honestly, I think that by posting this, you have already made up your mind that you are going to have your party on your day and are just hoping that the ladies will justify you doing so, that way you can tell DH "see all the other ladies would too!" Sorry if that is mean but it is JMHO.
Also, if this girl has been your sitter for a long time, did you consider that her feelings just might be hurt and you may loose a sitter?
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Actually if my DH think that it's best for everyone to have the party a week before, we will. We usually make decisions together and don't bring in outside comments. I just asked for advice from here because I wasn't sure if I was being unreasonable. I have never had this problem before and really am not sure what to do.
Our sitter already knows that she's having her wedding on the same day and knows there a chance we aren't going. She's loves our kids and isn't going any where soon, we also pay her more then she makes at her job so she never tells us no.
__________________
DeAnne
me 39
dh 49
dsd 03/07/1988
dsd 06/26/1983
ds 12/11/2003
ds 07/23/2005
dd 10/05/2007
4 angels lost; 7/2002, 10/2003, 12/2006, & 01/2007
V 11/2005, biggest mistake of our lives.
VR 9/2006, changed our minds.
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05-13-2008, 10:30 AM
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Host
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Fraser Valley, British Columbia Canada.
Posts: 7,539
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Re: Chatty Thread!
When i first read your post, to me it sounded like....
"I want to celebrate my birthday on the Saturday, but my sitter is getting married that day.. i dont think its a big deal they are getting married cus theyve already been shacked up"... yes, i misquoted.. but that was my condensed version.... to me it sounded like you were upset that you wouldnt have a sitter for your birthday because she was busy getting married.... I didnt gather that you had been invited and that the actual dilemna was about whether or not to go to the wedding or celebrate your birthday. So that was my error and I apologize.....
I think If I were in your shoes, me, personally, I would probably celebrate my birthday if it was a big deal, and my husband wanted to take me out etc....but then again, it would depend on how close the relationship is with my sitter.......
However, I wish you hadnt added in your opinion on the unimportance of it due to their shacking up...If you had said, "we arent that close, so I dont feel i NEED to be there...." or "she knows its my bday and i talked to her about it and she doesnt mind us not being there".. then that would be different.....
But to me, saying that, well heck, they are young, shacked up, two jobs, so its not THAT big of a deal that they get married. I think that is mean.
I think that in that situation, the love of family and friends (maybe not you if you arent a close friend and are just an employer) is SO important. When people are getting married, the people there are showing their support, their encouragement.... and it sounds to me like they have a tough time and could use that encouragement and support.
To belittle their union because they are not as old as you were and arent as financially stable is kind of mean in my opinion. Sounds like you are looking down your nose at them. They are young. Give them a break.
As I said, I was 'shacked up' for years with my husband. we only got married one year ago. and we were financially struggling, and if someone looked down their nose at us, id be pretty insulted.
just my opinion.
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05-13-2008, 10:45 AM
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Host
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Wyoming
Posts: 3,662
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Re: Chatty Thread!
Originally Posted by carriemb
honestly, I think that by posting this, you have already made up your mind that you are going to have your party on your day and are just hoping that the ladies will justify you doing so, that way you can tell DH "see all the other ladies would too!" Sorry if that is mean but it is JMHO.
Also, if this girl has been your sitter for a long time, did you consider that her feelings just might be hurt and you may loose a sitter?
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I am with Carrie & Shilo on this. It honestly comes across as if you are looking down on them because they have "shacked up" for 2 years. I know you profess to be a christian & that is against your beliefs, BUT they ARE rectifying it with getting married. I would think that you would support them for that decision. Not bash them. A wedding is important. Yes they have a lot going against them & then basically for you to be selfish enough to say that your birthday is MORE important? That is just rude IMO!! Obviously if she invited or plans to invite you she WANTS you there. Your support could go a long way in helping her. I dont see the big deal on having your birthday the week before or the week after. But........thats JMHO!!!
__________________
Host of TTC After Vas/Tubal Reversal
ME-33 (8-30)
DH-35 (7-7)
DS-10 (5-21)
DS-8 (10-23)
DS-(9/7/2007)
V-12-98
VR-8-07-06
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05-13-2008, 11:09 AM
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SKGuru
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Elmira, Oregon, USA
Posts: 631
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Re: Chatty Thread!
ladies, I don't want to start anything, I'm sorry I even posted here.
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DeAnne
me 39
dh 49
dsd 03/07/1988
dsd 06/26/1983
ds 12/11/2003
ds 07/23/2005
dd 10/05/2007
4 angels lost; 7/2002, 10/2003, 12/2006, & 01/2007
V 11/2005, biggest mistake of our lives.
VR 9/2006, changed our minds.
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05-13-2008, 11:24 AM
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SKGuru
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Elmira, Oregon, USA
Posts: 631
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Re: Chatty Thread!
p.s
start anything else that is. Look I like posting here, I'm sorry if I offended anyone, I guess I should have just stuck to the dilemma that I was having and left the comments about a person's lifestyle to myself.
Posting here is a privilege and I would like to keep coming here.
again,
sorry.
DeAnne
__________________
DeAnne
me 39
dh 49
dsd 03/07/1988
dsd 06/26/1983
ds 12/11/2003
ds 07/23/2005
dd 10/05/2007
4 angels lost; 7/2002, 10/2003, 12/2006, & 01/2007
V 11/2005, biggest mistake of our lives.
VR 9/2006, changed our minds.
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05-13-2008, 12:17 PM
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SKVIP
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Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: midatlantic states
Posts: 305
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Re: Chatty Thread!
Hi girls.. whew! hot topics! How is everyone today?
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05-13-2008, 12:43 PM
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Host
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Fraser Valley, British Columbia Canada.
Posts: 7,539
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Re: Chatty Thread!
ech
cranky
tired....
lol
bored
hmmmmm. yup, that about sums it up for me! 
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05-13-2008, 03:36 PM
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SKFriend
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 164
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Re: Chatty Thread!
I know people always talking about things being easier to interpret in "black and white" but I think sometimes things can be misconstrued when they are written down. When you have a conversation with someone you can read their body language and clarify misunderstandings early on. I think that's harder to do in a forum/bulletin board environment.
I just know that I have found everyone to be really supportive and open and I appreciate that you all have been here for me during some of the most difficult times of my life.
We had the meeting with the high risk OB today. We reviewed the records and Twin A was a chemical pregnancy so that was probably just a random thing that could happen to any one, not necessarily caused my bleeding/clotting issues. Twin B was a little girl with normal chromosomes so the blood clot I had was most likely what caused me to lose her.
My blood pressure has dropped dangerously low again. DH is out of town so my mom is on her way to stay with me for the next few days. They doctor is going to recheck things tomorrow and if they haven't improved I have to go back to the hospital. I'm trying to drink as much fluid as I can and stay off my feet because it was miserable being in the hospital and I don't think it really helped that much. I'd much rather be at home.
Anyway, that's my novel for the day. The weather is getting nice here and I am so tired of being stuck in bed. Hope everyone is doing well!
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Andi
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05-13-2008, 04:17 PM
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SKXpressive
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Join Date: May 2008
Location: Pa
Posts: 379
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Re: Chatty Thread!
Andi,
I really feel for ya hun, but you need to do what is needed to be done and get yourself good and healthy. When i had my last child i started losing her at 20weeks. The hopital i was in didn't give me a cerlage which i think they should have but anyway. I stayed in that bed till i hit 34weeks. They bathed me and everything. I didn't get out of that bed for nothing, lost all dignity thats for sure!!! It was the hardest thing i have ever been thru. The hospital was an hr away from my home so i only saw my husband and son mostly on the weekends. Ever since i take panic attacks everytime i have to go to the hospital for some reason...lol Moral of the story its all worth it in the end. Your story reallly touch me and i'm so glad i found this sight. All these women are so stronge especially you and that gives me alot of hope!!!!!!!
Vera
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05-13-2008, 08:10 PM
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SKDevotee
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 414
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Re: Chatty Thread!
Deanne, I have got to agree with the other girls. I havent been able to post, as I was in the hospital, but I was pretty shocked at your dismissing your babysitters wedding because she had "shacked up" with her boyfriend for 2 years. Thats exactly what Ive been doing for the last 2 years with mine, and I would certainly be upset if anyone thought our wedding was not a big deal. Thats a bummer.
Thats why we all come here, if we cant speak honestly with each other and say what we really feel, than whats the point? We arent always going to agree with each other, but thats what makes us all different and unique, right?
Ok with that said, Im out, Im hurting pretty bad. I went to the ER yesterday, thinking I had appendicitis, and it turned out I had a large ovarian cyst. So when they went in to operate, they drained the cyst and saw that my appendix was fine. It was done laprascopically so I have 4 small incisions with 2 stitches each on my belly and Im hurting pretty bad. I will be out of work tomorrow and maybe back on Thursday. No exercise until after the wedding and if i was lucky enough to get pregnant this cycle (I ovulated on Sunday), thats all over now too. Well maybe a honeymoon baby?
Talk to you guys later!
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05-13-2008, 08:18 PM
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SKImpressive
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Deer Park TX 77536
Posts: 2,953
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Re: Chatty Thread!
Mel, I am so sorry you have been sick.I hope you recover quickly..Yes a honeymoon baby that sounds perfect!!!!
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05-13-2008, 11:28 PM
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Host
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Wyoming
Posts: 3,662
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Re: Chatty Thread!
Mel I am so sorry hun. I hope that you are able to conceive your honeymoon baby. I will keep you in my thoughts for a quick recovery.
__________________
Host of TTC After Vas/Tubal Reversal
ME-33 (8-30)
DH-35 (7-7)
DS-10 (5-21)
DS-8 (10-23)
DS-(9/7/2007)
V-12-98
VR-8-07-06
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05-13-2008, 11:40 PM
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Host
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Fraser Valley, British Columbia Canada.
Posts: 7,539
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Re: Chatty Thread!
Speedy recovery Mel!!! Thats so awful!
Why the heck did you have such a huge cyst? Was it clomid related?
Glad it wasnt anything too serious, and hopefully you will have your honeymoon baby!
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05-14-2008, 07:27 AM
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SKDevotee
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 414
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Re: Chatty Thread!
They dont know if it was clomid related, because I didnt take the clomid this month. Its a possibiliy though, Either way it was just all bad luck for me. I looked at my cycle planner on FF, and they say my fertile days are the 5-10 of June. My bday is June 10. That would be interesting if I O on my bday and get a BFP on our wedding day! That would just be awesome! Im not going to renew my FF membership, Im just gonna test on our wedding day if I dont get AF before that. OMG, THAT would be sooo not good! To get AF in time for my wedding!!!! UGH!!
OK enough thinking for now. Im back to bed!
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05-14-2008, 07:44 AM
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SKFriend
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 164
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Re: Chatty Thread!
Mel-I had something similar happen on one of my clomid cycles. They didn't drain mine because the cyst was already draining but it was extremely painful. I ended up having to wait a couple cycles because my ovary was still enlarged (I think it would have been better if they had taken care of it surgically) and the next cycle I did try they gave me a lower dose of clomid. I ended up getting pregnant on that lower dose. I hope you feel better really soon and I've always said that my money is on a honeymoon baby.
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Andi
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05-14-2008, 08:36 AM
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SKLoyal
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: OH
Posts: 2,093
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Re: Chatty Thread!
Mel, sorry you were in the hospital but so glad to hear that it was just a cyst and not your appendix too! Rest up and get well.
Andi, I hope you can get your BP where it needs to be! Take care of yourself!
Something that just irritates me.................this isn't towards anyone in particular, it just is.
It drives me absolutly insane that people ask for opinions, what do you thinks, what would you do's and so on, then when someone gives an opinion or answer that is not what they want to hear it becomes a huge ordeal. Can you throw 4 women in the same room and have them all agree on everything? I don't think so. So if someone doesn't want an answer that may no jive with theirs, don't post the darn question. And if you still do post the question, try not to get all offended when person X doesn't agree with person Y, then start with the "I'm so sorry's, I guess I shouldn't post here anymore"
If anyone doesn't agree with what I said, please feel free to tell me to shut up, I won't get offended.
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married 10 years
Me 32 DH 49
TTC#1
Low Count, ASA's present
IVF 12-07 BFN
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05-14-2008, 11:02 AM
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Host
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Wyoming
Posts: 3,662
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Re: Chatty Thread!
Originally Posted by carriemb
Something that just irritates me.................this isn't towards anyone in particular, it just is.
It drives me absolutly insane that people ask for opinions, what do you thinks, what would you do's and so on, then when someone gives an opinion or answer that is not what they want to hear it becomes a huge ordeal. Can you throw 4 women in the same room and have them all agree on everything? I don't think so. So if someone doesn't want an answer that may no jive with theirs, don't post the darn question. And if you still do post the question, try not to get all offended when person X doesn't agree with person Y, then start with the "I'm so sorry's, I guess I shouldn't post here anymore"
If anyone doesn't agree with what I said, please feel free to tell me to shut up, I won't get offended.
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__________________
Host of TTC After Vas/Tubal Reversal
ME-33 (8-30)
DH-35 (7-7)
DS-10 (5-21)
DS-8 (10-23)
DS-(9/7/2007)
V-12-98
VR-8-07-06
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05-14-2008, 11:51 AM
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Host
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Wyoming
Posts: 3,662
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Re: Chatty Thread!
One more comment.....If they are young & working 2 jobs and going to college?? That is a lot more responsible than most people at that age. I think it is awesome that they are that responsible. Not something to look down on.
__________________
Host of TTC After Vas/Tubal Reversal
ME-33 (8-30)
DH-35 (7-7)
DS-10 (5-21)
DS-8 (10-23)
DS-(9/7/2007)
V-12-98
VR-8-07-06
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05-15-2008, 08:51 AM
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SKDevotee
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 414
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Re: Chatty Thread!
WEll Im still home. I made an appointment with my primary care dr to have my stitches removed tomorow morning, but he told me I was being "ambitious" thinking I could go back to work today. Now my next order of business is calling the whack job who did my surgery and ask all the questions I didnt get answered in the hospital. Like WHY am I bleeding and clotting??? What does this mean for my cycle? DO I mark cd1 as yesterday because I was bleeding heavily and rely on my moniter to tell me when Im going to O again? I started spotting on Tues after I got home from the hospital and freaked out. Jason was the one to tell me, oh yeah the dr said that might happen. Well HOW COME? Then yesterday it got heavier and the clotting started. SO the more I am up and about (which is what I should be doing), the more I bleed 
So I forgot what Michelle was going to name her baby. I havent talked to her in so long I was thinking about her when I was in the hospital Monday....LOL.
Hows everyone else today?
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