Hey Everyone~

Has anyone wanted a baby so bad that every where you look someone is preg? I don't know what to do anymore everywhere I turn and look I see a bulging belly. DH came to pick me up from work on Friday night and as we were driving home he told me that 2 of the guys in his office were expecting, at first I was happy and then I started crying. Now i can't stop thinking about it and always wondering when it is going to be my turn.

Has anyone gone threw this and what did you do?

thanks ladies

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Lacie (27)
David (29)
TTC#1 for three years now

natural
5/2/07 Beta #1 4,628
5/10 u/s and meet with doctor.
5/8/07 saw 1 beat today
EDD: December 30th

I know I am always excited when I hear someone is pg, but in the back of my head I wonder when it will be my turn. I looked around my house the other night and realized I have baby pictures everywhere (my nieces, nephews, friends, etc.). Read venting, I was given some great advice from Elizabeth. There is a special baby waiting for us somewhere and I can't wait to meet him/her.

Gina (29)
DH (34)
Angel baby (1-26-06)

I feel ya' .I live in a military comunity(sp) our dhs got home from iraq between dec-feb and now it seems like every woman I know with the ability to procreat is expecting. I do my very best to be happy for those of them that are happy about what is to come,the special gift that are reciving, but it really jerks my chain with the ones who complain, and go on and on about how the didnt want to be,had an oops, or are down right upset by it all. There is one at work who I just wish I could slap and say be happy,you have no idea how lucky you are. I have two beautiful children, and am experencing secondary infertility. I hope you get your bfp very soon.And please know you are not alone.

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"Love many, trust few, always paddle your own canoe"

After over 3 years of trying and getting 1 M/C out of all that, I went with my mom and sister for a weekend retreat. We had my niece of 3-4months with us.

My niece is exactly like me (looks , caracter,ect), everyone was telling me how beautifull my girl was and how proud I should be to have her....imagine the heartbreak each time I was telling them she wasn't mine or them noticing my sister was the one breastfeeding her not me. I swear that weekend , everyone either had a child or was expecting...it was so bad that I broke down one night at a restaurant. At first my mom and sister thought I was laughing/crying until they noticed that I just couldn't stop crying and was realy down about it all.

When I go to see a friend's son play hockey, I always get the " Which one is yours?" question, and get the look when I say " None of them". It's embarrasing.

I'm getting closer to the 5 years of TTC, and it doesn't get any easier. It's embarrasing, it hurts and it's hard to see any positive in the TTC journey when you see BFN more ofthen than you see buldging bellies. All of my friends are trying for #2 or more, have 3-4 year olds running around, ect. We are the only ones that don't have kids.

I'm lucky my sister let's me be a 2nd mom to her daughter but it's not the same, I always end up leaving her place without her.

We all need to keep faith that one of these days our number will be called and God will be able to anwser our prayers...we just have to hope it's before we turn 90...

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Anick (31) , Luc (33)
Fur baby Cachou
12 cycles of Clomid 50mg, all
Diagnosed with PCOS - Jan.2006
On break for 6 months

That's such a tough thing to deal with, Lacie. I think you can tell from the other replies that you're definitely not alone in having those feelings. I hold my breath everytime my DH tells me he talked to any of his friends that are in relationships, just waiting to hear that they are pg. Same way when my Mom says she talked to a cousin we don't hear much about, or any situation like that. I want to feel happy for them, and I usually do, but part of me gets really upset that I'm still waiting.

The only way I can deal with it is to do something that I know I won't be able to do when we finally have a babe. It's not as easy to do stuff like that now that DH is far away, but I go out for the night, stay out late, try to be spontaneous, have a couple extra drinks. Play your music in your car really loudly without worrying about hurting little ears. Play with someone else's kid, pump them full of sugar and then send them home to mom and dad (you can only get away with claiming ignorance and doing that when you are childless!). Sometimes I just buy myself something totally unnecessary, which I probably wouldn't do if I needed to pay for daycare. Soon enough, one way or the other, I know I won't be able to do that stuff. It's so hard. I also have stopped looking at baby stuff in the stores, because you're bound to run into a lot of bulging bellies in those aisles.

I'm just trying to make a point of appreciating the (relatively) responsibility-free life that I have for now. Don't feel like you're alone, we're all right here with you (virtually, at least). And we all understand how normal those feelings are.

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Me -29 DH - 32
Married June 13, 2003
Completely anovulatory without meds
10/07 - 12/07 50mg Clomid,
12/07 - DH's SA all normal!
2/21/08 - RE consult
3/08 100mg clomid cd3-7, no follicles, cycle cancelled
4/08 - 150mg clomid cd3-7, u/s on cd14, 1 follicle @ 24mm, trigger shot on cd14 and timed bd,
5/08 - HSG looks good
6/08 - IUI+INJ,
7/08 - IUI+INJ

Thanks Ladies for the responses. I am off to New York me and dh 2yr wedding annivarsy hopefully something will happen..

To make matters worse I am doing my internship on a fertility clininc. Its good in a way because my RE is in that office but to see everyone come in for testing it is a little difficult. I am interning as a phlebotomist. (drawing blood).

thanks again ladies

__________________
Lacie (27)
David (29)
TTC#1 for three years now

natural
5/2/07 Beta #1 4,628
5/10 u/s and meet with doctor.
5/8/07 saw 1 beat today
EDD: December 30th