I know that there are people here who have first hand success with some form of CIO, and have babies who are sleeping well. I am hoping we can be an encouragement to those just starting their journey to better sleep and are considering this option. It doesn't matter if you plan on regularly posting here or not, just stopping in to post your success story would be very encouraging to many, I'm sure .

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SAHM to Gabrielle 9/98 and Alec 4/04
Wife to Jeff since 3/96

Here is part one of my story- (part two will be about when nighttime sleep changed, and what I had to do about it)

When Alec was four months old, he was sleeping twelve hours a night, in his crib, waking only once or twice to feed. It was great and he did it all on his own! However, he was refusing naps, unless sleeping in the car, or taking extremely short naps. I tried the bouncy, my arms, whatever would work. My last method was holding the pacifier in his mouth and pulling it out gently when he was asleep and leaving the room. I let him sleep in my bed for daytime naps. This worked well from 2-4 months of age, but there were some days when he took 7 catnaps in a single day, even at 4 months. Then at 4 months, two weeks of age, he started really resisting the pacifier method and was not napping. He was very fussy and tired during the day. I learned that night sleep and day sleep were organized into different parts of the brain and that his brain was organizing day sleep starting at this age. Also, he was becoming more alert and aware of his environment.

I used CIO for naps with my daughter around 5 months old with great success, so I decided it was time to start with my son. (I did research all the methods this time around though, before settling on a CIO method.) I decided to watch for Alec's sleepy signs- gazing out, rubbing eyes, the beginning of fussiness, and at his age (4.2 months), I also tried to make sure he went an hour and a half to an hour and 45 minutes between waking and naps. I wanted to keep him up long enough to avoid a catnap, but not so long that he became overtired and had difficulty settling to sleep.

I created a short naptime song, rubbed his back and put him into his crib. My rule was that he needed to stay in there for an hour. After an hour, I would get him up and if he didn't sleep much, I would keep him up for the next nap an hour and 45 minutes later, and then the 3rd nap could be taken in the car if he hadn't slept well that day. It was difficult in the beginning, but not as bad as I thought. I was worried it wouldn't work, but determined that I would give it two weeks and if there was no improvement, I would ditch the plan and try something else. He rarely cried for more than 10 minutes, but was only sleeping for 40 minutes, and there was the occassion where he would refuse a nap. The days he refused to sleep weren't fun because I had to listen to the crying, but I had my backup plan to slip in a quick car ride so that he could catch up on sleep. He learned to sleep within a couple of weeks though, and it was such a relief to have him napping!

He loves it when I hold him and sing the naptime song. He snuggles into my shoulder, as soon as it's done, he practically dives into his crib. He LOVES naptime now! He also no longer sleeps in the car, because he is so well rested. When we are out, I get told what an alert and happy baby he is. It's a great feeling!

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SAHM to Gabrielle 9/98 and Alec 4/04
Wife to Jeff since 3/96

Evan had been a horrible sleeper since birth! I brought her home from the hospital and she bearly slept that first day home at all!! I would walk my house with her for hours! When she finally did get to sleep she wouldnt sleep very sound. She BF for a good portion of the night. This went on for about 5m. Then she started going to sleep fairly easily (late though 10 or 11). And only waking 4-5times a night to BF. Then at about 6m she started wanting to feed all night long and getting restless in my bed. ie. sitting up crawling arround. This went on for 2m. I finally couldnt take it anymore and decided sleep training was in order. Both for her well being and mine.

Evan is high needs, so the traditional comforting techniques didnt work, wont take a paci, no lovie, I couldnt lay her down at pat or shush her to sleep. I finally had to put her in her bed and let her work it out on her own. (sounds bad,huh) But it worked. I

Now, I feed her and cuddle. Then Dh will take her to her room and he will cuddle and pat her back for a couple of minutes. He will put her down and cover her and she is asleep for the night. No night wakings, she now sleeps from 7 or so till 6; she'll feed then go back to sleep for another hour.

I have seen a 90% (were still working on naps ) change in her personality!! Sleep has done wonders for her!! And for me!!!!

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Nicole mama to:
Bowen 13
Maysun 6:
Evan March 25,2004
Maddox Nov 10,2005

those are great! I want to read more, More, MORE!

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Grant wouldn't nap.

I was finally able to get him to fall asleep with me in the rocking chair before transferring him to his crib. Sometimes he would sleep through the night and awaken screaming and crying in the morning.

Sometimes he would awaken during the night and I'd have to bring him to our bed where he was never able to really fall asleep again afterwards. Because Grant is a light sleeper, he'd awaken at the slightest noise, movement, cough, etc. I'd be awake, dh was awake and Grant was awake with periods of something resembling sleep in between.

The only time Grant would sleep during the day was when I'd run errands in the car.

I realized something had to be done after I had to "drive him to sleep" one night. He awoke earlier than usual (about 9:20 p.m. instead of 11 p.m., 12, 1, etc.) and there was nothing I could do to get him to fall asleep and he was EXHAUSTED.

I posted a message entitled, "Anyone have to drive their baby to sleep?" Anja had a response that really opened my eyes and I decided to take action - that it was now or never.

I asked for advice and received great support from the wonderful women on the Unhosted April 2004 board. Kristen was wonderful and provided me with much information, advice and suggestions. I couldn't believe she would take the time to help me in such a personal way as I know she is busy with her own family!

Bottom line - Grant sleeps through the night and takes two naps during the day. Yes, he still has no problem crying when he wants me during the day, but he knows that when I put him in the crib that it means it is time for sleep.

Grant is a healthy, happpy and well-rested baby.

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Kathy and Nicole- Thanks for posting your stories!

Here is part 2 , nighttime sleep issues solved-

As I mentioned in my first post about nap training, Alec was sleeping through the night on his own. I thought things would stay that way. My daughter naturally started sleeping through the night, only needing a 5am feeding, around 9 months old. The CIO training I did for her was for naps. Also, when she stopped falling asleep before bed with while I fed her a bottle, I used CIO when I put her in her crib. I was ecstatic when Alec started sleeping through the night on his own so young at 4 months old! How quickly things can unravel....

At 6 months old, Alec was teething and had a cold. He wasn't eating much or drinking much during the day. He started waking at night needing comfort because he was sick, or a bottle because he was hungry. Of course I responded as I should have by giving him what he needed. He wasn't taking much of a bottle at night either, but I was glad he was willing to take something during that time. (Note- Please don't start any sleep training during painful teething or illness, or employ CIO during this time!!)

Alec recovered from his cold a week later. He was still waking up at night crying at least twice a night, but sometimes 5 times a night. Dh or I would respond by picking him up and patting him, or giving him a bottle. If I would pat his back and put him back down, and he would cry, I would then give him a bottle. He was taking each bottle hungrily, or going right back to sleep after the patting of the back. Dh and I were getting very sleep deprived, and Alec was getting crankier and crankier. I incorrectly assumed that if he had once slept through the night, he would do it again all on his own. Two months later, he was still waking all night. I had never done all night sleep training- this was new and scary territory for me. Gabrielle only needed to cry at the beginning of the night when being placed in her crib, but I knew if I started with Alec, it would be all night long. I also knew though, that the sleep deprivation was killing dh and I, and that CIO would be the fastest method- we had already proved it worked for naps.

The breaking point came when Alec started refusing almost all bottles and solids during the day. I mean, why should he eat during the day when he was getting all of his calories at night? I tried cutting down the amount of formula he got in the middle of the night, but he would awaken a short time later demanding more. This became a health issue. He needed to sleep at night, and eat during the day, and it was my job to show him how.

Morning one he took a measly two ounces of the bottle I gave him. An hour later, I tried to get him to take as much cereal and fruit as I could- it wasn't much. The afternoon and evening, I alternated bottles and solids. I knew that night one of sleep training, he was going to be hungry and I couldn't feed him for awhile. He took a large bottle before bed at 6:30pm (the only large one he was willing to take all day), he woke crying four hours later. I didn't go to him at all. He would have been hysterical if I went in there and that's all he wanted was a bottle that I wouldn't give it to him. He cried for an hour and went to sleep again for 30 minutes. At 12am, he cried again off and on until 2am. I was so relieved to finally feed him. He then woke for the day at 7:30am! He took his morning bottle hungrily and ate a big bowl of cereal and fruit an hour later. He took his bottles all day long and ate solids! Not as much as he should have, but much better. Night two and three were rough also, but not nearly as bad. I had an 8 hour rule- I would not go in before 8 hours to feed him, and I would not feed him more than once in a sleeping period. I want to add that he was less cranky when he was crying all night than when dh or I were getting up with him all night. He greeted me in the mornings with a big smile .

Within two weeks, Alec was completely nighttrained! He goes to bed at 6:30pm, wakes between 4-5am for a bottle, and wakes for the day between 7:30-8:00am! He takes a long morning nap of around two hours, and his afternoon nap is 45 minutes to an hour. I promised myself that I would give myself two weeks for nighttime CIO to work, and if it failed- if there was no improvement at all- I would ditch it for another plan. The same thing I told myself with the naptraining. That way, in my mind, there was an end in sight. I also told myself that in two weeks, two short weeks,dh and I should at least be getting more sleep. What a shock and amazement when it only took a few days to see an improvement!

Some additional explanations- Alec is a "sleeper" like my daughter was, and is at the higher end of normal range for hours of sleep. However, sleeptrained babies sleep 10 1/2-12 hours at night before they are wanting to be up for the day.

Between 5-8 months, a baby usually needs to wake once or twice for a feeding, and this is considered normal. Waking 3 or more times a night is not considered normal at these ages, unless recommended or advised by your pediatrician due to low weight or other health issues.

I'm hoping for more success stories on this board ! That's why I'm here .

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SAHM to Gabrielle 9/98 and Alec 4/04
Wife to Jeff since 3/96

Okay, I'll go.

My first time sleep training happened with my oldest son. I was back to work and Michael was 6 months old. He would not sleep more than 2 hour stretches at night. At first, I tried to deal with it - getting up with him, nursing him, rocking him, whatever it took. But then reality hit - I was a zombie at work, practically falling asleep at meetings and on the drives to and from work. I decided I needed to do something about Michael's bad sleep habits.

I went to the bookstore and purchased a number of books. I read Ferber, Ezzo, Sears, Hogg, you name it, I had it in my hands. Of all the books I read, only one book by Marc Weissbluth really hit home for me. So I decided I would try it out.

It was hard. The first night around 12 midnight, Michael cried for 45 minutes. Hearing him cry was like being tortured. But he eventually fell asleep and did not wake for the rest of the night. The second night, instead of getting better, it got worse (which I expected since that is what many moms told me would happen). He cried for 55 minutes. But the third night, he cried for 10 minutes and that was the end of it. He didn't cry anymore for night time feeds, he began sleeping from 7pm to 6am every night.

Now with my second, Ryan, I had to reaquaint myself with sleep training methods. When Ryan was 5 mos old, he was very sick and was in the NICU for intusseption, a problem with his large intestine. When your baby is sick like this, with IVs in his hand or feet, you make a promise to yourself that you will never let him hurt or cry again if you can help it. So I would happily let Ryan sleep on my chest every night. One night, I woke up and I could not feel my legs - it was like I was pregnant again! Ryan just wouldn't sleep on his own in his crib. (What also compounded this problem was the fact that my boys both share a room - so if he cried, the other would wake up). So, around 6 mos DH and I decided to let him CIO. He did - but it only took around 4-5 days to get him back on track. During this training time, I told my oldest son, that if Ryan cried and woke him up, he could come into our room and sleep. Which he did. When sleep training was over, Michael went back to his room easily.

Now Ryan is a great sleeper. He sleeps from 7:30pm to 6am every night. He naps well too. Naps followed the night time sleep. He used to nap terribly - taking half hour to 40 min naps. But now he naps for at least an hour, 2x a day.

I am all for sleep training and using CIO. But I must say that people need to read and be educated about sleep training before trying it or dissing it. It isn't something you can just do when you're at your wits end. If you know what to expect, then you have a better chance of succeeding. I'm happy to see this board here so people can give and receive advice about it.

Lastly I have to say this, because I'm tired of hearing people tell me that letting my kid CIO will screw him up psychologically for the rest of his life. My son is almost four now, and I seriously doubt that 3 days of CIO/Sleep training will screw him up for the rest of his life. He is a smart, well adjusted kid who is loving, independent and bonded with me and his dad. If he has a problem sleeping at night - he gets up and tells me. He has not in anyway learned not to cry or not to call for us.

I can totally appreciate the other non CIO sleep training methods. Like Kristen said, consistency is key with any sleep training method. We are lucky enough to have used CIO to great success, with children who not only sleep well at night and during naps, but are bright, happy loving kids during their waking hours. It makes me feel good - not just having a full night's rest - but knowing that I had some role in teaching my kids how to sleep on their own.

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Rachel
Ryan (4) and Michael (7)
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Kristen gave me a nudge to get this on here, so I'm happily responding

Well, you're welcome to take my advice or not. I understand that what I did may not work for everyone. I think there's a myriad of factors that go into choosing what works for you and your baby... temperment, your beliefs on discipline, and even your beliefs in human nature. I know my little girl, just like each of you know your little ones. You know their types of cries, their grins, their glances... as a mommy you know them inside out! You are a competent and adequate decision-maker for your child in this regard... you're the mommy! When I decided to do CIO I had spent the first 4 months with Cassidy sleeping in our bed with us, and then the next two putting her in her crib but getting up MANY times a night to nurse and settle her back down. At 9 months Cassidy would go to bed around 8pm...up at 10:30, up at 1:00, up at 2:30, 3:30, 4:30 5:30, and 6:30 get up for the day. I was a zombie! Basically, she'd wake up and want to nurse to go back to sleep... sometimes she would eat, sometimes she wouldn't. It depended on how quickly I let down. Anyhow, it wasn't good for anyone... DH and I were tired, Cassidy was tired... we were living in a perpetual state of crankiness (naps were a nightmare as well). I finally decided that I had to draw the line somewhere. My child was ruling me. So, one day I started with the first nap of the day. I nursed her and put her in her crib. She started to cry, a couple seconds later, but I said "Night night" and left. She cried for 2.5 hours on and off before she finally went to sleep. Fortuntely my daughter is long winded, but never made herself sick. I know this isn't the case for everyone. She didn't nap for very long (maybe 30 mintutes) but I picked her up since she had done what she was supposed to do. Nap #2, I did the same thing. She went right down because I think she wore herself out from the first ordeal. Bedtime I started a routine of taking a bath, reading a book, nurse, and into bed. She went to bed fine, and when she started her pattern of waking I didn't go in. I resolved that I wouldn't nurse her again until somewhere around 4am (after 8 hours of sleep). Now, sometimes I know that people can go back in and rub their baby's back and get them to go back to sleep, etc.... not mine. If I were to go in and try that and not pick her up, she would become hysterical, so that's why I wouldn't go back in. Anyhow. I heard her wake up several times that night. She would cry... I think 30 minutes was the longest... and then go back to sleep. The biggest thing for me was that I HAD to be consistent. That meant I had to keep my emotions in check ( I don't believe that just because we "feel" something that it's right) and not project my own cognitive ability onto my child.... i.e. Cassidy is going to hate me because I'm making her do this, she thinks I've abandoned her, I'm emotionally damaging her etc... I had to remind myself that the reason she's upset isn't because she's hungry, unloved, or hasn't had her needs met.... she's upset because this isn't the normal thing that happens and it makes her mad. About 3 days of this, each day was progressively better than the last, and now I have a baby that goes down for her naps twice a day without a whimper (ocassionaly fuss-to-sleep... jabbering to herself for a few minutes, but that's normal), and she goes to bed from 7:30pm until 4:00am (nurses), and then up for the day between 7and 7:30am. On a sidenote about nighttime feedings.... I've read in a couple different places (medical books) that babies have the ability at 9 months to sleep through the night without needing feedings. They should be getting all their food during the day between solids and nursing. Because I knew she wouldn't be snacking all night long anymore, I had to be very consistent with meals and snacks for her during the day as well. Well, I think that's about it. Oh, I might mention that there are periodic setbacks (illness, etc...) that you have to accomodate for, and you'll have to spend a day getting back into the routine, but it shouldn't be like before hopefully. Honestly, I think this is so important because it's a foundation for a lot of things regarding discipline. You're not being mean to your child, and it is okay to "be the parent"... I hate how so many baby trends these days make children into "mini rulers" over the household, parents bending over backwards to their every whim. You are the most valuable teaching instument in your child's life to teach them basic values and disciplines, and it starts as something as simple as sleep sometimes. It did for us. I hope that you find ways that work for you and yours to make the sleep transition effective!