I am sorry I didn't post this here earlier, but I just wanted to say that I was thinking and praying for all the mamas here that have had a pregnancy loss of any sort-and I hope that today was a day filled with remembrance and hope, not just sadness and grief. I know for me it was a good day, much more positive than last year, when I still felt so freshly in the midst of my loss. 8 months seems like such a short time, and I felt it so deeply.

Today we remembered Catti, and thought of her, and talked about her, but also listened to BabyE's heartbeat, and talked excitedly of my big ultrasound next week.

It was a day far from last year's, but I am grateful that every year I can have another special day for Catti, besides just her angelversary, to think about her, and have others as well.

So know that all of you were on my mind today.

I'd love to hear from you, and remember your angels too-so please feel free to share your loss stories again, and how you feel now, how you felt then, just any and everything you might want to share.

<3

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just wanted to give everyone who has had a loss a huge hug and send my prayers and thoughts!

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to all who have had to face this one.
for peace and joy in the face of loss.

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I lost a baby In September of 1995 due to an ectopic pregnancy.I had told to ob that something wasn't right but they assured me everything was ok.A few days later I was in so much pain and I had started bleeding,so I called the hospital,they told me it was normal and that I should stay off my feet.

A week later I was on a city bus,the pain was back and worse than before,so I made my way over to a clinic,and the docter there said she wanted me to go to u/s at a hospital.I had no money,but I did have a check to cash,so I went to the bank,cashed my check and jumped on another bus to the hospital.

I waited 2 hours for the u/s,the guy was a jerk to me because I was young.The tech said he didn't see anything,didn't believe I was pregnant,and even asked me if I was faking,he thought I was wasting there time,but the docter I saw wanted me to go down to emergency and have myself admitted to the e.r.

It was a horrible experience,and if I would have listened to the tech over the clinic docter I would have died,I was almost 11 weeks pregnant,and was told it could have ruptured at any time.They gave me meds and tylenol 3's.I was so ill from the methotrexate(sp?) that I was throwing up for a week,I couldn't walk at all and I didn't eat for a week either.

My boyfriend who was the father wasn't with me through any of this,just my mom was.I was a little ticked that some of the things that happened the nurses never prepared me for,all they said was the embryo would dissolve,but when I went to the bathroom,this perfectly formed little baby was on my panties,so tiny and precious.I was in so much shock I didn't know what to do I just screamed for my mom,then we both cried for a long time.

I am very grateful for my girls,and that I did not experience another ectopic pregnancy.Sorry if this was TMI but this is really the first time I have shared this much detail about my loss.

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nikki, i'm glad you felt safe sharing with us, and what a terrible and scary thing to go through! you must have been pretty young too, right? how old were you?

*hugs* to you, and a prayer today for your and your little angel.

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I had just turned 18 a few months before.

Thanks Jen,that really makes me feel a lot better.

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OH Nikki--that is so heartbreaking and just wrong that they were so mean to you!
I'm so sorry for your loss and for the horrible experience!!
HUGS to you hun!!

Hugs to you too Jen--Catti is on my mind alot, but you know that.

I think you all know my story of loss, but I'll summarize, just in case someone is reading who doesn't know.
We lost our 2nd baby--Amanda Joy-- at 31 weeks gestation in March 2000.
Her memorial website and complete story link is in my siggy.
We then lost our 3rd baby--Baby Bean--at 7 weeks gestation in December 2003.


I'm remembering all our babies who are gone too soon....hugs to all the loss mamas---Jayme, Judi, Shaila, BrandiT and others who have not posted as well....HUGS!!

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HOUSEPLANTGIRL
Wife to my highschool sweetie for 12 years
Mommy to "Little Man" (10-my Tween!)
"Angel Amanda" (stillborn)
"Baby Bean" (miscarried)
"Lil Miss Sassy Pants" (almost 4)
"Mr. Squishey" (17 months)
and PREGNANT!!