? for French-speaking 'mamans' (long)

Marisa · #1 (**permalink**) 10-02-2005, 11:34 AM

Paty, Christine (anyone else I may have forgotten):

I am assuming that you both speak French at home with your children. Do your kids speak english as well?

A little history...Our plan was for me to speak English with the kids & Dh would speak to them in French (his mother-tongue, but he went to English school his whole life). We always speak English with each other, except when we are with the ILs, then we speak French.

Anyway, being that I am at home with the kids, Alex always speaks English. And he speaks it very, very well. Because DH & I speak English with each other, DH found it rather difficult to switch to French when speaking to Alex. The worst part is that the ILs also speak English with Alex. They may start off a conversation in French, but as soon as Alex responds in English they switch. It drives me crazy!

Right now, Alex is going to pre-K two mornings per week 'en francais'. The teacher says he tunes out sometimes because of the language issues, but all in all he likes it and seems to understand most things. Whenever I try to initiate French with him, he totally doesn't pay attention and won't even try to repeat things or say things that I know he can say in French.

Anyway, to make a long and whiny story short, any suggestions? DH reads to him in French from time to time, and I let him watch French cartoons whenever I can find some on tv. What else can we do? I brought this up with dh that maybe we can try having conversations in French when he comes home from work until the kids' bedtime.

I know that eventually he will speak French, because we live in Quebec. I would just like him to speak better than his dear ol' mom.

Mewsin · #2 (**permalink**) 10-02-2005, 10:35 PM

I know I'm not a French speaking mom but the speech therapist we had with Waneeke told El to always speak to the kids in Cree and never switch to English and that would be the easiest way to get them to know the language.

Patymomof5 · #3 (**permalink**) 10-03-2005, 06:40 AM

I would always speak in French whenever the kids are up I mean eventually they won't have a choice to switch. My kids do not speak English for the simple reason that they all needed or need to see a speech therapist so one langage is best for us. I learned English when we moved to Oregon I was 16yrs. It was hard cause the only words I knew were welcome thanks yes and no. Being submerge in the language/environment it took me and my sister about 1 month and we were good to go. I now only watch movies in English and mostly only American channels I know bad

So going the French way only should do the trick. You need to tell your IL's to do the same to keep speaking French even if he replies in English

Good luck.

Marisa · #4 (**permalink**) 10-03-2005, 07:07 AM

Jodi, that's great that El is speaking to your kids in Cree. I forget where I had heard/read that if you want your kids to speak more than one language, then a good way to teach them is have one parent speak one language to them and the other parent should only speak the second language.

I saw this first hand with my cousin. His ex-wife is French Canadian and she always spoke French to the kids; he spoke English. These kids can switch effortlessly between both languages; it's a beautiful thing to witness.

Paty...

. Must have been a huge culture shock for you at 16 yrs. From what I can see, you write very well; I assume that you speak just as well.

And BTW, I only watch American TV too.

I have told the Ils many times to speak French to the kids...in one ear, out the other.

In my experience, English is a much easier language to learn than French (less rules, but more weird sounds like the 'ph' in telephone.) I'm sure that your kids will learn English when they are older (just as I am sure that Alex will speak both languages, too). I guess that I am being a silly!

I think for now, we might try to speak French in our house as much as possible when DH is home. I don't know if I could do it all day long by myself.

It would make my head hurt.

ChrisnCam · #5 (**permalink**) 10-03-2005, 04:32 PM

We speak french only as we are both french and all our families. We learned english in school and that is how Camille will learn. This city is more english than french so it will be easier for her to practice.

Our neighbors do both language, he speaks english to the kids and she speaks french. He speaks french to us but we speak english to him hahaha quite confusing! The kids are switching over and over and they are really good.

I think if you or someone else in the family starts a conversation in french...even if he answers in english, they should continue to speak in french. Don't know if that would help to have him eventually have the conversation in the same language...something to try maybe?

Tonight I was trying to have Camille say her first english words, I was saying I love you and she said, I wuv you... too cute

RenÃ©e aka chikoka · #6 (**permalink**) 10-03-2005, 04:53 PM

I know I never post anymore but I thought I'd butt in LOL

As you know I am french speaking and DH is english speaking.

We did the "I spoke only french and DH spoke only english" thing and its working very well.

Dh will use some french words at times if Mimi doesn't seem to understand.

Mimi is also learning spanish in daycare... so sometimes it does get a bit confusing for her... but she seems to understand all 3 languages fairly well. Its when she speaks that she sometimes mix and match all 3 languages togheter LOL Quite funny at times.

The suggestion I would give you would be to really have your DH and the ILs make an effort as far as Alex (and Samantha) is concerned... honestly french IS harder to master IMO so the sooner the better.

Also... now with DVDs you don't have to compromise... you hav e2-3 languages for the same movie... so I would buy or rent a few and play them in french.

If you don't feel comfortable speaking french (which is OK... I beleive its best when its one parent stick with one language and another with the other language) you could learn some french songs and sing in french... maybe it wouldn't feel as weird. I have alot of websites with songs and "comptines" in french... email me if you want the links.
(rpbuteau@sympatico.ca)

Also... another thing you could do is get these crads with words on them... some are bilingual... we also found placemats at wal-mart with the alphabet that are bilingual and trilingual. Or you can print them out yourself... again some websites links I could give you.

Good Luck!

Patymomof5 · #7 (**permalink**) 10-04-2005, 05:48 AM

Paty.... Must have been a huge culture shock for you at 16 yrs. From what I can see, you write very well; I assume that you speak just as well. And BTW, I only watch American TV too.

Yes Marisa it was very hard. I cried a lot

well worth it now but didn't think so then. Everyone gave you great tips! We were gonna do one speaks one language but since our kids have speech therapy we were told it's best not to do it. We can always teach them later. Our DD will be 12yrs in 20 days and she understands lots of English of course the "bad" words mostly

Marisa · #8 (**permalink**) 10-04-2005, 07:47 AM

Renee...I made you come out and play.

Thanks for the suggestions. I will be e-mailing you for those websites.

Paty, my FIL teaches Alex bad words/expressions in French (hey, at least it's something

).