So, DH and I are at odds, in a friendly but intense way, about tithing. Not the general concept of tithing but a specific application of tithing. We've always differed on the tithe-on-the-net or tithe-on-the-gross concept but since I write the checks.... (I feel that taxes are a bill and we don't pay all of our other bills and then tithe on the remainder so why would we only tithe our income after tax had been taken out?) DH differs with me on that point but we've come to an agreement that we tithe on the gross.

Now we are getting funding for his schooling in England and another conflict has come up. We have gotten two private donations for our schooling and my automatic response was to write a check for $800 to cover the tithing. DH was shocked because he didn't see the donations as income but as funds specifically given for our schooling (e.g. his grandmother certainly wouldn't have wanted 10% of her school donation to go to an unrelated cause such as a church she doesn't believe in). He feels that this isn't income we can just do with as we please, but money given specifically to pay the bill for school.

I am torn because I can understand part of where he is coming from. I mean, we wouldn't have put aside money for tithing if someone had sent a check to the University directly to pay for our tuition. But maybe we should! And I really feel like any grant money we get is more earned than my paychecks from work. I have worked my tush off researching and putting together those grant packages!!!! My feeling is that when a check goes into my bank account then another check for 10% had better come out. And while we could really, really, really use the $800 (a month's worth of rent!) I just don't want the Lord to be niggly with his blessings so I really don't want to be niggly with my tithe paying.

But here we are, two faithful people with two different stands and one checkbook. One of us needs to be convinced--anyone have an opinion on one side or the other??

Marianne

My only way of looking at it is that the bottom line comes down to exactly what you said, though I've never heard the word niggly lol. I'd rather err on the side of over payment and hope for extra blessings, then be justifying away every financial blessing as something that shouldn't be tithed.

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Well, my dh and I had some similar disagreements when he was in school and receiving grants and student loans, etc. We finally agreed that we'd tithe on our increase...so if we were getting a student loan, we didn't tithe on it because we were soooooooo not on the increase side of things when all is said and done...infact, after interest on it for 15 yrs of payments or whatever it is, it would sooooooo not be an increase. Know what I mean? I always thought I needed to pay on it, but he disagreed and I went along with that much. He disagreed on how well I paid my tithing while I put him through school, but since I went along with his way on the student loans, he went my way on the other thing!LOL I'd err on the side of overpayment of tithing, like Michelle said! There are so many ways to interpret the way to pay tithing! I always just prayed that I was doing the right thing and I think Heavenly Father knew I had good intentions...not like I was going out to buy a new boat or something with our student loans instead of tithing! More like it was going to pay the $11,000 a semester tuition bill!LOL

Personally, I think I would pay tithing on the grant if it passes through your hands. If it was paid directly to the school, it seems like they are paying for you, that it's not actually your money. however, if any of it goes into your bank account, then you are responsible for how it's spent. KWIM? We don't pay on loans, but I asked dh what he thinks and he said we'd probably pay on a grant. Of course there is no black and white answer and if you haven't already, you could make it a matter of prayer. Or even go to your Bishop for guidance. I hope you guys work it out!

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~*~ Katie ~*~






http://thewanfamilyadventures.blogspot.com/

Yep, I agree that it doesn't seem that tithing money would be owed on loans. Though it may be a check that goes into your account it isn't income in any real sense of the word any more than a car loan or a mortgage is.

DH is going to talk it over with a member of our stake presidency who happens to be a good friend. And I'm thinking I won't have to rewrite that tithing check, KWIM? I'll let you know, though.

Marianne

I agree with what Katie said. It makes sense to pay tithing on it if it passes through your hands, but if it goes straight to the school, probably not, because then it's not *your* money.

And just as a side note, I've always been a pay-tithing-based-on-net-income kind of person. If we get any money back on tax returns, then we pay tithing on that.

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Becky
DH Jesse
DD Melinda, Oct. 16, 2003
DS Jacob, Aug. 14, 2005
#3 due March 26, 2008

Personally, I would pay tithing on the donations. DH would agree with me. But I understand how it would be hard to decide whether or not to do it. A matter of prayer, for sure.

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Angela