I'm pissed.

So my son goes to daycare and today apparently was a "gift swap day" for Christmas (a little early , ya think?!) where the parents buy a cheap gift and if you have a son you label the gift I.E. - "to: BOY from:Trenton" And then he will swap with another boy.

Anyways, I didnt know this until I walked in the door this morning and his teacher was like, "Where's his gift to swap?"
And I was like, "WHAt ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?"

I had Noooooo clue what was going on.

Well they said there was a sign posted on the door - um NO there wasnt it! She tried to walk me to the other side of the door but came up with nothing -it was on the INSIDE of the room my DS is in.

Well they have this rule where at 5pm all the remaining children go into one big room which is across the hall from my DS's room.

So this whole time I never went into DS's room for anything because I never needed to too.

Well, as if I didnt feel bad enough for some poor kid who wasn't going to get a cheap gift from my DS, I said "Well, can I give him 5$ so his parents can buy something they want?"
His teacher told me to ask her supervisor.
So fine... I went and asked the same thing and the lady made me feel horrible!

I said I didnt know we had to bring gifts there was no sign on his door and we picked up kids out of the older children's playroom.
She gave me attitude like - "Well, they were posted on ALL the doors."

I was like " ExCUSE me, but I dont read notes on their doors because my child is not in their class. AND how am I supposed to know that the same thing that's going on in the older kids class is going on in my DS's room when there is NO sign on the door?!"

Implying that now, I am a bad mother for not knowing or not taking the time to know that today was gift swap day...or whatever the hell it's called.
Noone had even said anything to me about it at any time until today.
I'm not a psychic!!

She said "Don't worry about it." But in a bitchy tone.
I was like "Well, can't I give money?"
She said "No, its doesn't matter, don't worry about."
And that was that.

Well - I got deep sh!t going on with my personal life and that just took the cake! I started crying when I got to the car.
WHy would she make me feel bad?

So because I am the person I am and I feel bad for EVERYTHING no matter how small - I went and bought the damn gift!
I spent $9.99 not just 5$ for the poor boy.
I went home and EVEN wrapped it.

I drive all the way back, walk inside and they are already done swapping.
So I say "Here. I felt bad so I got this for the boy who didnt get anything." They looked at me like I was crazy, and said " Ok well...you didnt have to."

OH NO BUT I DID HAVE TO! Or else I was going to remain THAT horrible mother that didn't check the older children's door so she could buy someone elses kid a present so her son wouldnt be left out!

So, I leave and no one says thanks for being considerate. Or thanks for taking the time to go get it even when you didn't know until today.
No thank yous....just evil eyes.

Okay well, maybe it was a small thing to be upset about - but when there is so much stress going on in your life already - the smallest thing can make you feel like the worst person in the world.

I still feel like I am a bad mother in some way for that.

Am I?

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I would be upset too. Why didn't they send a note home?

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Jessica,
dh: Chuck
SAHM mom to:
Emily (10/13/99) and Hailey (07/10/03)[/color]

I dont know - I guess that's not how they operate or something....Well I was mad when I initially wrote this post, and I'm over it now.

But I still think they were at fault.

Oh well....

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I know this is an old post....but I just read it and had to reply.

I'm so sorry you were put through that experience Megan. The daycare centre should have send home notices with every child, that's what our centre does. I also bet you weren't the only parent to not read the notice on the back of the door. I know when I drop off my son I'm always rushing to work...and when my DP picks him up she is usually busy talking to him not looking at signs on walls or doors! I bet the centre had a few bits and pieces that they were able to use as substitute gifts, surely they wouldn't allow a child to go without?! I feel for you leaving the centre so upset, then going out and buying something more expensive, wrapping and rushing back, only to find the exchange all over. The staff sounded very uncaring also. I guess you've put that day behind you now, but I just wanted to say I totally understand your reaction, and wish you weren't made to feel so bad. And yes, that is way to early for a gift exchange!! Hope you only have positive experiences with the center this year!

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If it makes you feel any better I wouldn't have participated in a xmas swap even if I did see the sign. Not everyone celebrates it .

I know this is old too but it reminded me of what my son's daycare did. His teacher called my house one day and said "You need to bring a gift tomorrow for gift exchange" and I was like okay but dang, couldn't they give a girl notice? What if I hadn't been home when she called (cos Ethan didn't go to daycare the day she called), what if I didn't want to get out THAT VERY night to go buy a gift? I thought it was horrible that they couldn't give me more than a days notice.

But I was actually still upset with the daycare because a few weeks before that I get a call from my mom saying she was at the daycare (cos she drops him off in the morning for me since i work very early) and they were taking pictures. PICTURES? And did I want them to take Ethan's? Uh, NO! I would've if somebody had TOLD ME they were having their pictures taken. I was mad. So when I picked him up that day his teacher said "I can't believe you didn't let him have his picture taken" and I said "Well, I can't believe nobody informed me they were taking pictures, cos if I had known I would've dressed him nicely and been prepared." and she just acted like I was crazy.

hehe, anyway, that's my rant. Long story short, no I don't think you were a bad mom by not knowing and it was wrong of them to make you feel that way.

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-Amanda-

Just wanted to empathize with you....even though this is an old post! I was an infant and toddler teacher in a child care center for five years, and have a home day care now, and we never did, nor do I do now, have holiday swaps. It puts families on the spot-some people don't celebrate that holiday, and some would LOVE to participate if they weren't already struggling to meet ends meet, but really don't have the money for it. I've always done small holiday gifts that I give to all the children (a board book, a coloring set, etc) but don't think swaps are a great idea in a child care setting.

The only things that we'd have parents sign up for were to bring a food item for special party days-and we'd get signs taped down right next to our time clock at the center about two weeks prior, where EVERYONE could see it-and we'd also mention to parents to check it out if they were interested in signing up-it wasn't a mandatory thing.

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