I just don't know what to do - I'm feeling so frustrated with our potty training stand off! My twins are almost 4 and we are at a stand still - I feel like I've done all the reading, talked to other parents, etc. - and now we are at an impass....

First Ella - she is completely trained accept for pooping - she insists on having a pull up even though she's done it on the potty before (about 4 times). We've bribed her with MANY things - but unless the moons are aligned, she won't do it. If we didn't have the pullups here for Grayson, I would just tell her sorry, we don't have pullups anymore and force it, but....we have Grayson's pullups.

Then Grayson - he will pee in a pullup or underwear - the only time he will consistently go on the potty is if I leave him naked. When I do that, I've discovered that he pees a little bit at a time many times a day - I've read that they have to be holding it longer to really be ready, so I haven't forced it for that reason.....

I would totally be ready to be hard line with the both of them, but every source I've read says that you shoudn't force them - and that if you do, it backfires and only makes things worse. That instead, you are supposed to encourage and reward and let them show you when they are ready. Does this still apply to kids who are ALMOST 4!!!?????

We had family visiting from out of town over the weekend and my aunt was very vocal about how she thought my kids were "running the show" and that there is no reason that they shouldn't be fully trained by now - and my Dad agrees. This is so hard to hear this critisism when I am just trying to do the right thing!

ugh! I would appreciate advice! I am going nuts here!

Wendy

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Ella and Grayson ............Best Friends & Twins

My advice.....get rid of the pull ups all together!!! I personally discovered how "evil" those things are myself! They just prolong the process...for real. Leave them both in plain ol' underwear....they will eventually "get it". Sure it can get messy, but it's better than "flushing your money down the toilet"!!!

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I just had to respond to this - DS is almost FIVE and is 90% daytime potty trained. It has been a Long Hard road but we are almost 100% there! We started at 3.5, it would have been sooner but ds was extremely resistant and then we moved so we waited until the end of the school year.

The ONLY thing that worked for us (outside of not ever using Pullups during the daytime) was basically learning to accept it. Nothing I did ever made the slightest bit of difference except to make it worse if I got upset. If I praised, it made no difference. If I bribed with trinkets, candy, anything it worked for awhile but it did not train, he would pee/poop for the reward and then go back to doing it in his underwear.

Yes there were times that I lost my patience, but only a very few times let it show. Yes, us moms should be sainted!! We made it though, I still need to remind for pooping, I just emphasize at the time that he usually goes that he needs to 'try'. I hate nagging him, but I ask him to 'try' and usually he'll go, and this has led him to recognize what it feels like when he needs to go, so I don't think telling/asking is a bad thing. I remember my mom telling me 'I' myself needed to try when I was little, now this was 40 years ago and I still remember it so it had to be when I was 4 or so...and I was considered potty trained at 18 mos. so I don't think asking them to try is considered not potty trained.

Hang in there, it will come But it took us Forever and it was very very gradual, where it came down to a few days ago I realized he hadn't had any accidents in awhile now. What a wonderful realization!!!

I never used pull-ups with my oldest two, so I would say give those up unless you want to use them at night time only. If so, then you need to hide them. My youngest (almost three) is not interested in potty training, but I think she is ready. I am going to just put her in panties and see how it goes for a few days. Just keep trying-sooner or later they will get it! Good luck!

1st thing, I'd take them to the Dr. to make sure there isn;t a medical problem for them not using the toilet... If there are no medical problems then I have to completely agree about the evil evil pull ups My sister had my 3 1/2 nephew in them for a year and the day she ditched them was the day he started to use the toilet.

If you are afraid to take the full plunge to undies.. Maybe try a cloth training pant with or w/out a plastic linner.

w/out the plastic linner...
http://www.pottytrainingconcepts.com/30GTPB-z.html

With plastic linner....
http://www.pottytrainingconcepts.com...nts-IPB-z.html

But make sure to just accept you will be cleaning up some poop and pee and changing cloths a lot for a while. It really sucks but it's a good way to get things going in the right direction.

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with us pullups were just more diapers even the ones with coldness linerin them no go i bought some padded underwear from walmart (baby aisle generaly on the bottom shelf like they are hideing lol) and some plastic liners and my 2.5 year old is nearly potty trained on going #1. #2 we are still battleing and night time well i confess pullups or super cheapo diapers are used there but that is a whole other battle so back to topic JMO get rid of pull ups except at nighttime for both the kiddos it takes a lot more effort but it is worth it Good Luck!

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