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Newbie from Colorado
This is a discussion on Newbie from Colorado within the TTC - After Age 40 forums, part of the Trying to Conceive - Age and Experience category; Hi all,
I'm so glad to have found this forum. I've lurked here for a few days and ...
I'm so glad to have found this forum. I've lurked here for a few days and I've really been impressed with the generally positive atmosphere. (I've checked out a few TTC boards elsewhere and the level of obsession and anxiety so many were expressing was making me feel awful!)
Here's my story. In December my husband (51) and I (44 at the time) decided to see if we could conceive. We had never tried before, though we had discussed adopting a few years ago. Frankly I thought I had no chance because I was "too old." Well, I conceived on the first cycle - in fact, with the very first try on Christmas morning! Amazing. I thought it was a miracle.
Sadly, I miscarried in February. It was a missed m/c with the baby at 8 weeks, 3 days but not discovered until 11 weeks. I had a very long, drawn out m/c experience (two rounds of Cytotec and eventually a D&C), which was horrible.
In the process I changed OBs and now have a very kind and supportive doctor. He gave us the go-ahead to start TTC as soon as I've had one period, if I feel ready. Meanwhile I've turned 45. At this point I've had nearly 2 months to come to some peace with the loss, but of course I still have moments of deep sadness. I think if I were younger, I might wait a bit before TTC again, but at this age, that clock is ticking at a deafening volume!
Well, AF arrived last Thursday, exactly 3 weeks after the D&C. So we are getting ready to try again. I am really focused on staying hopeful and upbeat, while trying to accept that "what will be, will be." Some days I feel confident that we'll conceive easily again. Other days I read the statistics and feel quite worried about my chances.
I told a friend the other day, "This was a lot less stressful back when I thought I had no chance of getting pregnant. Now that I know there's a chance, I really want a baby!" Irrational, no doubt, but true.
Hi Kelly
I too am new here. Haven't heard from anyone yet though. I just posted my first blog. Im 42, DH 48, 2 DDs 18&16, TTC since July 2005 after DH vasectomy reversal. I am still hopefull I will conceive. I had no idea how stressful this would be though. Is the waiting time once the day of expected period arrives and nothing happens for a while that really gets me. My body has changed so much since turning 40 that is hard for me to tell what's going on half the time. Ive been checked plenty of times and everything is fine with me, right down to the ovulation part. Cycles are still every 28 days. Right now I am 3 days late, but hpt was negative yesterday. I had cramps all the way till Saturday, the day before my period was due, but right now I dont feel a thing. I dont kwno what to think. I do not feel at all like my period is going to come. My breasts feel a little bit fuller but not too much. It's been so long since I've been pregnant I dont think I could tell on my own if I was.
Write anytime you want. I can't wait to start chatting with someone here.
Take care
Olga
Where did I come from?" the baby asked its mother. She answered, half-crying, half-laughing, and clasping the baby to her breast: "You were hidden in my heart as its desire, my darling. You were in the dolls of all my childhood games. In all my hopes and my loves, in my life, in the life of my mother, and in her mother before her, you have lived."
--Rabindranath Tagore
Newbie from Colorado
Pamela
on 2/23/2008!!!!!!!!! 
Hopefully you will conceive again as quickly and easily as the 1st time. Best wishes to you and keep us posted. 
is the worst!
