I'm wondering....I am 38 and lost my first baby on January 16th at a little over 6 weeks....do the chances of miscarriage or multiple miscarriage increase with age? I really feel like I am running out of time on having a baby and I am not sure my husband and I can handle losing another one. Any other women out there trying to conceive for a first baby in their late 30's?

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--Sandy
40 yo/DH 38
TTC#1 since 10/05
M/C 1/16/06
BFP 8/31/06
EDD 05/06/07

Scarlett Born 5/10/07

First, I'm so sorry for your loss. It's very hard to get passed, I know. After 3 years of trying and drugs, I finally got pregnant at 36 only to lose my baby at 8 weeks. Like you, I was scared to try again. 4 months later, I did the drugs again and had a healthy pregnancy and now have an almost 1 year old dd. I don't think having 1 m/c necessarily increases or decreases your chances of having another. My angel baby was a Trisomy 13. The chances of me having another Trisomy 13 are extremely low.

Make sure you take the time you need to grieve. Then if you and DH are up for it, go for it again.

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Cricket

I know how hard it is to try again after suffering a loss, but it's definitely worth it. I suffered an 8 week loss before I had my son and waited a good six months to try again, just because I was so shaken up by the experience. But in retrospect, I wish I hadn't waited so long. It kind of prolonged my grief.

m/c, unfortunately, is very common, no matter the age. I have heard 1 in 4 pregnancies results in m/c. I guess it's just nature's (painful) way of making sure that those who make it through are prepared for the journey. Both young and old are prone to them.

Having said that, age does increase your risk of certain genetic problems that may lead to m/c.

There is a great book I read called "Pregnancy After Loss." It's really great and I highly recommend it to you. Here is a link to it on amazon.

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/042...Fencoding=UTF8

Your next pregnancy won't be the innocent experience you were wishing for, but it will be worth it nonetheless. I say get pregnant again as soon as you can. No time to lose!

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- Deb (39)
- Nathaniel : Born September, 2003
- Spencer: Born December, 2006

Hello. As you know, I also had a m/c in January. I'll be 40 in March. I have three children, and this was my first m/c. My last child was born a month before my 37th birthday. That pregnancy was not without it's worries for me, but it was all in my own head...not because anything was going wrong. It was just me repeating to myself all I had heard and read about pregnancy over 35. My daughter is perfectly healthy and almost three years old now!

I've read that m/c is more common as you get older, but then again, women of all ages have them.

I know it's scary to think of trying again. It is for me too. After all, I consider myself pretty lucky to have gone through this m/c so easily...no baby to mourn, and no pain, and my body took care of it all on it's own...even my period wasn't any longer than normal and my body seems to be picking up right where it left off. But, what about next time I get a bfp? What if I do see a baby and a heartbeat and then lose it? Well, yes, that could happen. I can't pretend it isn't a possibility. But, if I let that stop me from ttc, I also won't ever get to have that beautiful 4th baby I long for to complete my family. If I let fear stop me, I'll never have the joy.

So, I'm waiting one cycle to let my body get itself back to normal, and then, if all goes well with this current cycle, I'll be back at it ttc again.

You might need a little more time to get yourself back to that point, but I think sooner or later you will come to the same conclusion...that you still want a baby and if you don't try you won't have one. Sometimes we have to be willing to take the risk to get the prize. It isn't always easy, but when you do get the prize it's always worth it!

There are many women older than you and me who have healthy babies. Talk to your doctor. Perhaps he/she can help put your mind at ease. One m/c doesn't increase your risk of having another. If you've had two or three, then there is a definite concern.

Hugs to you and I hope you are able to ttc again soon, and when you do please feel free to join those of us ttc on the due in boards. I'm over on the November board now. There are at least three of us there who have lost our babies/pregnancies in January so you won't be alone.

I wish you a very happy ending the next time!

Just wanted to offer you some (((hugs)))

Thinking of you.

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Vanessa (36)

My Chart

Everyone is right. Yes, we do have a greater chance of miscarriage but it's due to a greater chance of some chromosomal issue. That said, if you have had one miscarriage, your chances of having another are no greater than they were before you had that one. Does that make sense?

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I'm 38 and don't have any kids. I had a m/c a little over 2 years ago @7 1/2 weeks, and a few extremely early ones since then. I never went to see my dr., and spent about 3 weeks bleeding like a faucet. Whenever i think about it, i feel like it was my fault. I didn't realize i was pregnant until right before the m/c, and had x-rays done for my shoulder and hand.

It kills me that i might now have a child old enough to be calling me mommy. I keep wanting to quit. But i have one friend who keeps telling me this. If i keep trying, i might or might not ever get pregnant and have a baby. If i quit, it is 100% guarantteed that i will never have a child. It comes across harsh, and i sometimes want to strangle him, but it is completely true. A loss(or a few) can be very painful and discouraging, but getting back up and continuing on is one good indicater that we're still alive.

((hugs))

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I am so sorry for your loss. I am 36 (will be 37 in June) and am ttc#2 asap. I am scared about m/c, but there are many things to be concerned w/ during a pregnancy. Unfortunetly, the older a woman is/ the older her egg quality is-which is a quite different from sperm that is constantly being replenished. But that does not mean that perfectly healthy children/pregnancies are not common at an older maternal age. My neighbor just had her 5th child at 42 (all normal). Anyway, everyone has to make the choice/s that are right for them, and I wish you luck in your journey.

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My Mommy is so Funny

Hi,

I am very sorry for your loss.

I had my 1st child at 35. I have had 5 losses since. I had my last of 4 children at age 42. I am totaly still hopeful at 45 to be able to do this one more time. I know that 2nd as LMaKenna said... if you quit it will NEVER happen. I host the TTC over age 40 board here on Sheknows, and we have a 45 yr old who had her 1st this past March. Persistence is key. Good luck to you.

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Where did I come from?" the baby asked its mother. She answered, half-crying, half-laughing, and clasping the baby to her breast: "You were hidden in my heart as its desire, my darling. You were in the dolls of all my childhood games. In all my hopes and my loves, in my life, in the life of my mother, and in her mother before her, you have lived."
--Rabindranath Tagore

Thanks for responding.....it's nice to hear from women with the same situation at hand. I am forever grateful for this site, however addicting it might be. I am still awaiting my AF since my m/c last month.....it's coming, I can feel it. I want to be hangin out in the din or did rooms so badly!!!! Again, thanks for your kind words.

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--Sandy
40 yo/DH 38
TTC#1 since 10/05
M/C 1/16/06
BFP 8/31/06
EDD 05/06/07

Scarlett Born 5/10/07