Hi! I'm working on the No Cry Sleep Solution, and seems to have wonderful suggestions, but I have a few questions....

1) I'm not sure when to do my original sleep log, since all of my daughter's (11 months old) nights are sooo different. Some nights she's up 8-12 times, sometimes it's just 1 or 2.
What type of night should I log??

2) Is it normal for there to be so much variation between nights? She seems to have about 3-4 nights where she's waking up constantly, and then 3-4 nights where she's only up a few times. She doesn't have any "usual" times that she wakes, either......it's different every night.

3) The book says to put her down groggy, but she usually won't even let me do that.....she pitches a fit!


Thanks for any ideas or suggestions!!

Signed,
Desperate and insane from lack of sleep!

hi melsnapp,

i was/ ('am' really) still at a very similar stage to you, but just thought i'd share my thoughts in the hope that you get something/ ANYTHING out of it.
i just know how alone i feel at times and if all you get out of it is that you are soooooooooooo not alone, at least that's something. that's what i love about this site; a few days ago i was crying for help and support and got it from a lovely mum and this week i can hopefully help and support you. it all goes
around.

1st - biiiiiig hugs to you.

2nd- my son (10mnths) is exactly the same in terms of unpredictability. i can count on about 8 wakings a night, but when choosing a 'log' night i just chose one without especially long settling sessions or terrible teething. i think it took about 3 nights of logging to come across this illusive 'average' night.

i have no idea what 'normal' is, in fact i think it's a cruel word sent to make us feel like we're failing.
but my ds is same same. one night he's up at 8:00pm, 10:00, 11:00, 11:30pm, 12:30am, 1:30am, 3:30am, and pretty much constantly from 5:00am (this horrific example was my night last night)... however, the next night (& i'm hoping it IS the next night) he may only wake 10:30pm, 12:30, 3:30, 5:00am, 6:00am & up at 7:00am (hang on! that's almost as frightening).
i can never tell.
one thing i am always certain of is when he goes to bed. this absolutely never changes- 7:30pm. we found a time that works for us and stick to it religiously.

in regards to the 'pitching a fit', oh sister, i hear you!
it has taken us many weeks and much 'tweaking' of times & techniques to get to the wonderful illusive land of 'drowsy'.
this is where we've had our greatest success. it obviously isn't in 'staying' asleep! YET!!!
my advice to you here is follow as much of EP's plan as possible, work hard at your removal technique and don't be afraid to REPEAT REPEAT REPEAT!!!
i changed my expectation from 'if i do the 'right' things in the 'right' order, he'll go to sleep... easily (it's so funny to see it written, but that's what i thought at a really base level) to i don't know how long it will take for him to get to sleep or if he will sleep at all (oooh, that one is hard), all i know is that i will do my best to provide a lovely, calm, peaceful (if possible) space for him to want to sleep & i will try to be neutral and calm. i keep in mind what i might need to fall asleep if i were wired on 7 cups of coffee or something.
so sometimes it works a charm and sometimes it doesn't and i'm trying to be OK with that.
but what does always work is REPEAT REPEAT REPEAT!!! i put him on the breast, he settles, i pop him off- he screams, i pop him back on straight away, he settles, i pop him off & get him in the cot- he screams, i pop him back on the breast, he settles, i pop him off- he cries, i pop him back on, he settles, i pop him off, get him in the cot- he fusses about a bit and grizzles and crawls around the cot, i pop him back on the breast, he settles, i pop him off, get him in the crib, he fusses- falls asleep... i CLICK the sides of the cot up. YES! i used to nearly have to chew my arm off to get out from under him (i had to feed him lying down in our bed & couldn't even transfer to cot). i stay calmer now because my expectation is different. so you see, sometimes it takes a bit of time and others (most times now) i feed him to drowsy, put him in the cot, maybe he fusses for a second and falls asleep.

his naps are getting longer too, used to be 15/20min, today he slept for 1.5hrs

hope this helps in some way.

love&light