Hello. I'm not new to SheKnows, but new to the Co-sleeping board. My baby is six weeks old and it looks like we are going to be co-sleeping on a permanent basis. This is fine, we had no premade plans about where the baby would sleep. We did, however, decide that she would atleast sleep in the room with us. Anyhow. Here's my trouble. My DH is so frantic about her being in the bed with us so that he know's she's ok, BUT he leaves it up to me to be the one to really sleep with her. We do not have a co-sleeper. We've tried the sleep positioner that we have and she won't have it. She wants to be held, period. This is fine too. I just can't figure out how to get some of the sleeping load taken by DH. He always says he's afraid he'll roll over on her or he'll let her go and she'll turn over or something. It's like "What, you don't think that I'm afraid of doing the same?!?" I have gotten MUCH more comfortable now though b/c I have been doing it so long. Still though. Do you ladies have any ideas or suggestions on how to help the situation at all? TIA

__________________

Hey Amanda - you have a crib right? Have you heard about doing a side car? You can take one side off of the crib and then tie it to your bed. That way once she's fallen asleep you can just scoot her over into the crib.

I know you said that she wants to be held and nothing else. Maddox is the same way. One thing that does help him is the swaddle blanket. If I don't put him in the blanket he's also good with me holding his arms down. I think he just jerks himself awake. KWIM?

Good luck! If you ever need to talk you know that I am here. It's quite an adjustment becoming a Mommy!

__________________

Ashley - Pround Mom of 4 boys
And I wouldn't have it any other way!
Andrew (12), Austin (9), Alex (4)
and Maddox Dominic
09/27/2006

Amanda, Parker is exactly the same as Lillie. He wants contact, period. We tried the swing, carseat (which he will sleep in for awhile alone), the bouncy, the bassinet...all of which he'll sleep in as long as we are touching him. Obviously we can't stand beside his crib all night and hold his hand so we've resorted to cosleeping also. DH is also VERY scared that he'll roll over him but he will hold him while we sleep. We take turns each night otherwise my arm (elbow/shoulder) feels like it's broken when we wake up. This has just started the last few nights though because he wouldn't help before that. Good luck in getting Brandon more comfortable in holding little Lillie.

__________________

JESSICA - 23 ~~ DH - SAM - 23 ~~ DS - PARKER JON - 9.27.06

I noticed myself starting to have shoulder/elbow trouble too. Good to know I wasn't just imagining things. She has started sleeping through the night the past week. So I think I'm going to try staring a bedtime routine and swaddling to see if she'll go back in the bassinet. We'll see.

__________________

sounds like my house.

my DH has the same fear. i read an article in Dr. Sears that did say that moms have a more natural instinct not to roll onto the baby, but who knows....I have three sleep positions now....on my left, with my left arm above joey's head, below my pillow, keeping him away from them and the headboard, and also sort of touching DH's back to make sure I'm aware of where he is in the bed, right arm over joey's legs/tummy/below him, ......or, on my back with joey on my chest on his tummy (he LOVES this, but it doesn't last) or the exact opposite side......

We bought a king size bed this past weekend b/c of co-sleeping! I can't wait for it to come. We're in a full size right now.

If you figure out how to get DH more comfortable let me know. Mine is going to have to do it eventually. I have a weekend scrapbooking retreat in February and he'll have Joey all to himself.

__________________

We have the same problem, too, but found a strange solution:

Whenever DH moves, the dog moves, which wakes me up, and I make sure DH hasn't rolled on DS. It's my 60lb alarm. But DH, even though he is scared of rolling over, will be totally fine EVERY time he moves... he always moves in place and doesn't even know it! He's picking up on the natural instinct

Give it time. And change positions often. DS sleeps half the night on the inside, half on the outside... we have no bed rail, but the box spring is directly on the floor and he's never even gotten close to the edge of the (full size) bed... he scoots toward me little by little all night

__________________