I should probably post this in extended breastfeeding, but I don't go there much, so I am posting it here.
My son is really young, so it could be that I just don't know how it works, but nevertheless I have a question. I have been reading on other boards that "don't ask don't offer" is a weaning technique. I plan on actively offering as long as he is unable to directly ask. But once he can ask for it, I plan on just letting him ask. I guess what I am asking is did you guys offer a set number of times a day to extend nursing? I guess I just feel like the most natural way for nursing to end is this technique that lots of people call a weaning technique. I don't want to wean him before he is ready, but I also don't want to make him nurse when he wouldn't want to on his own. Any thoughts/opinions?
Karen

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Karen

Although I've nursed 4 children I have yet to go through this My 1st started refusing the breast at 10 months and I managed to keep him nursing until just about a year when he just flat out refused. (In retrospect, I believe it is somehow related to his Autism and sensory issues.. I think he liked to nurse but couldn't stand the close contact)

With my twins, I nursed for 5 months and did have to supplement each baby after every feed... At 5 months my supply went to nothing almost over night. The boys dropped weight fast and I tried everything to make my supply come back. Nothing worked so I just gave up out of frustration.

Now Reece, LOVES the boob (almost too much, he's nursing about every hour around the clock LMAO) My supply did dip recently at 5 months again, Reece was only having 2 wet diapers in a 24 hr period . I have NO IDEA why it happened again... but we got over the hurdle and my supply is back where it should be. I can totally see this baby going 18 months-2 years My goal is a year, my personal limit is around the 2 year mark. I think by 18 months I'll only nurse when he asks and hope he just doesn't want to one day... Wishful thinking? LOL!

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I nursed until a year... basically I nursed before naps and bedtime, and then any other time he wanted to nurse which he definately let me know when that was... but about a year he refused, and I kept gently trying for 2 weeks after that (not so that he was frustrated with me... just offering!) just in case it was a nursing strike, and then I just realized he'd stopped on his own... I had been prepared to go longer as all my friends have breastfed way longer than that, but he didn't want to, so that was interesting!

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Host of:
The No Cry Sleep Solution
Attachment Parenting

One thing I will say here is that you dont need an 'exit strategy'. Sadly there is s o much pressure from society to put a time limit on how long you will nurse for. well meaning family and friends always ask "how much longer?"
But that is so unfair because then you start to feel a bit odd about it all and start to wonder if you should give up nursing.
Dylan doesn't look veyr old - is he? I dont think there is an answer to how many times a day and for how long and so on...... I would say just do it and not think about it ... one day you will realise that "oh he has nursed less this week" or something like that.

This is what happened with my 4 ..... I nursed Ashley my eldest son till he was past 2 - after about 18 months he just nursed at bedtimes and first thing in the morning. I didnt use any technique - just let it drift to an end KWIM
Hollie was 2 plus and it just came to a natural end - I didnt even think about it or use any technique ... it just petered out till one day weekshe was nursing for about 4 seconds only each time and I knew that was the end.

Ellis went on nursing strike at 9 months for a week and by then he had taste of formula milk and he never really went back to the boob ... I also tandem fed hollie and Ellis with Hollie lasting 5 monthsmore than Ellis.

And Summer - I am still nursing serveral times a day.

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i had a huge reply typed out, and have no clue where it went.... :headscratch:

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no, not a set number of times.


you can not make a child nurse who doesn't want to. you cna offer, and if they don't want to nurse, they'll say no, and grab the nearest truck (robot or whatever, lol) and start driving it over you, playing airplanes, or whatever.

my dd just turned 4 and usually nurses first thign in the morning (except she didn't ask today, hmm) and at bedtime. the only other times she asks to nurse is if she has fallen and gotten a boo-boo etc.

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Oh no, Dylan is only 10 months. I don't plan on weaning him ANY time soon. I am just interested in the "don't ask don't offer approach." Right now I offer all the time. Usually way more than he wants to nurse. He is in the high energy just want to get into everything age and I am so worried about him not getting enough! I am planning on just going with the flow, but I cannot imagine him weaning anytime soon. He is still SUCH a baby! I'm going to start working on signing with him and see if I can get him to sign "milk." Thanks for all the replies.
Karen

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Karen

Please don't make the mistake I did with ds. He was a big boy and I figured he could wait awhile to nurse so I would ask him to wait while I finished the dishes, finished helping dd with her schoolwork, or whatever. He was a fairly easygoing baby and would find some other activity to entertain himself so I wouldn't want to bother him to remind him that he had wanted to nurse when I finished doing whatever.

I accidentally weaned him very quickly, which had never been my intention. I still feel bad about that even though he is a teenager now.

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Here is a bunch of great info about weaning from La Leche League:

http://www.llli.org/NB/NBweaning.html

and extended breastfeeding:

http://www.llli.org/NB/NBextended.html

and below is the page where you can find a La Leche League leader or group near you. I called them on the weekend to ask a question, and even on the weekend, during the summer, the leader called me back within about 15 minutes and talked to me for over an hour... very helpful! Here's the page:

http://www.llli.org/Webindex.html

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Host of:
The No Cry Sleep Solution
Attachment Parenting

Hey there - I haven't posted here before, but hello!

I'd agree with Amanda - you don't need an exit strategy. And as Mama Bear said, you can still offer, and no way will a child nurse when he doesn't want to. I'm still nursing Anna who is 3.5. She nurses at night before bed, and before naps on the weekends. She sometimes asks to nurse in the am and sometimes she doesn't. When Anna was under two, I didn't need to "offer" ever! Her requests were frequent enough. I do find I offer routinely before bed b/c that's part of our routine. If you keep offering, you'll find he'll either turn you down or accept. And that way, it's child-led. Enjoy it as long as you are both happy nursing.

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Shannon - 35 DH - 36
Anna Josephine - Sept. 28, 2004
http://mybabyhatesthis.blogspot.com