I know people mean well and think I'm just uneducated about VBACs. I'm just tired of explaining why I am planning a c/s both on-line and IRL. As soon as I meantion a c/s date they ask me if I've considered a VBAC) I tell them it's not safe for me and they want to know why in case I'm wrong. Sigh.... As soon as I tell people my LONG birth history (which includes 3 c/s and one horrific VBAC) they back off. I'm just tired of having to explain myself. Does anyone else go through this?

__________________

I guess I haven't felt like I owe anyone an explanation. People can be so opinionated and believe that their's is the only "right" one. IMO delivery options are between the parents and the doctors, and together they make the best decisions they can for both the mother and baby. I don't regret either of my c-sections, and am ready to have my 3rd one in July.

__________________
A 10-01-01,K 05-05-03, and Z 6-28-07

Yes, I get the same thing. It's almost like they are telling me I don't know my history or my body that they know better than me. When I was pregnant with Leanne and would get the question about why the repeat c/s and no VBAC. I would explain why Alvin was a c/s in the first place and chances were it would happen again. I would get the whole well just because your first was big doesn't mean your second will be big. Well, after Leanne was born at 39 weeks and her head was 1/4 inch bigger than Alvin's those people have backed off. Of course anytime having a third baby comes up people who don't know always ask why not a VBAC. Then I have to explain it to them. It drives me nuts, I don't feel like I should have to explain myself. A c/s for me is the safest avenue for the baby and me.

Hugs,

I've only had, one baby, so only one C-section, no repeats yet, so don't know if I"d be annoyed! I could understand why you might if someone is doubting your reasons or knowledge of your own body. However, I regularly have discussions with people about my first labour and C-section and think most people are just curious to hear my story, not judgmental or anything.

I am one of those people who asks other women about what they would do the "next" time, as I'm genuinely interested to know how they come to the decision, not knowing whether or not I, myself, would want to plan a repeat C or try a VBAC (is helps me to decide for my own next child). I hope I would never come across as judgemental of someone else's decision. I love talking to people about their birth experiences, because they are all so different, emotionally and physically. But if I mention to other women that I might consider a VBAC, I'm sometimes made to feel like I am a crazy-woman and have to defend the fact that I would even consider it (and I'm not even pregnant yet!). So I guess I've exerienced the reverse of what you describe!

For some women a repeat C is safer for them, for some a VBAC is safer, so it really depends on the case. Unfortunately though, many women do not even know what a VBAC is (including friends of mine who had a C-section the first time), and so assume they have to have a C-section automatically. It might be good for someone to ask them if they've considered it, so that they can discuss it with their doctor, family, etc to make an informed choice of what is best for them in the end, whether C or VBAC.

I get it all the time. I delivered my first 2 vaginally...my 3rd had a lot of problems....frank breech, placenta up front as well as previa (unless it's the same I forgot)....the cord was also short and around baby's neck 3 times....so was it safer for me and him? You betcha! I wouldn't trade his delivery for anything.....he was able to be born healthy and w/o complications from a vag. delivery.
If we have another, I'm going right with the c/s....I've already been "lectured" I should "try" a VBAC...should I? Maybe....do I want to....no I don't end of discussion. My body, my choice.

__________________
Becky

Noone has ever asked me.

__________________

Oh, yeah. And it's even more annoying when it's family members (extended, but family nonetheless) who are doing the whys et al.

I basically say I'm having a R-c/s because I do not care how this baby makes it into the world as long as this baby is alive and well after the fact. Because if they know me, they know my history, and if they don't, they can kiss it; I don't care.

I remember one family member who went on about how she was going to deliver her son the natural way, and basically stuck her nose in the air after I told her I was going to be a repeat section (previous pregnancy). By this time I was fed up with her attitude and said something along the lines of, I may be having a c-section, but I'd rather have a scar on my belly than the grand canyon between my legs.

Catty? You bet.
But she shut up right quick, and no one's questioned me since.

Then, the truly (and I try not to get to smug about this, really, I try) karmic part was that she wound up having a section anyway.

I really don't get the bad rep that c/s have.
In a way, it's like people who get crazed over their wedding day.
It's one miniscule moment in your life. It's the marriage that matters, not the wedding. It's the health and the safety and the raising of your child(ren), not how said child(ren) arrived. I

__________________

I am not sure I have ever heard this before. There is a greater risk for a VBAC for women who have had one section or more. The risk if for rupture with the force of labor.

That's NOT to say VBACs aren't safe for some women - they just are safer than a repeat section.

Yes, I get tired of hearing people ask me over and over too. This will be my fourth section.

__________________
+JMJ+

Kelly Mom to:
Jordana 1/98
Isabella 9/01
John Paul 12/02
Zachary 03/05
Nicholas 03/06
Charity is that with which no one is lost, and without which no one is saved. ----St. Robert Bellermine