Hi I'm Maricruz

luckymlo · #1 (**permalink**) 03-25-2007, 01:58 AM

Hello everybody,

I found out I was 5 months pregnant a month ago. The father of my baby and I split when I must of been a month pregnant. When I found out I was pg, I was furious with him and called him up. He was confused as I was at the beginning, and I told him that I did not want to have the baby. I ended up keeping my baby because I did not want to have an abortion in my conscious. I had always dreamed of having a family with the man I love, and the way this happened completely burst my bubble and my dream. I am 27 years old, and feel like I shouldn't be going through this since I am old enough now to not have made this mistake, making a baby with someone I don't feel anything for. The father is very happy he is being given the opportunity of being a father, but I have not let him see. I have refused to talk to him, or have any communication with him whatsoever. At times I feel very lonely......being pregnant and being alone makes me feel frustrated, angry, and lost. I was not expecting a situation like this ever to happen to me, but I guess somethings happen for a reason (since it never happened in a 7 yr. relationship I previously had), and being with the father of my baby for only 6 months and becoming pregnant. I have now accepted the situation and the fact that I am going to be a mom, but am I being too hard on him and on me. I want my baby boy to also have my last name, not his, and he is not too happy with that.

Thanks for reading.

Maricruz

DecMom · #2 (**permalink**) 03-25-2007, 02:58 PM

It can get lonely. Once the baby is here you will know you made the right choice

Pregnancy for anyone is difficult, emotionally and physically. Do you plan on letting the father see your son once he's born? Whatever choice you make now could always change a few months down the road, and thats ok.

Have you decided on any names?

luckymlo · #3 (**permalink**) 03-25-2007, 10:10 PM

I will definitely not deny my son the opportunity to know his father or even him to know his now, it's just for now, I don't want to see him.

You know, about the names.......I'm having a really hard time finding one. I never realized how hard this would be. My family has given me so many choices, but I still can't decide on one yet.

Thanks for replying

goldenrose222003 · #4 (**permalink**) 03-25-2007, 10:13 PM

You've got a bit of time left. Nice to see someone else is awake! If you saw my thread on birth cert, I'm going through a bit of a hard time deciding on a last name too. Only difference is that there is NO WAY I'll give the baby my last name. What kind of work and such do you do if you work out of the home?

luckymlo · #5 (**permalink**) 03-25-2007, 10:19 PM

Yeah! 3 more months more. Can't seem to get sleepy yet. I'm a high school math teacher and coach track also. How about you?

goldenrose222003 · #6 (**permalink**) 03-25-2007, 10:21 PM

I have 7 weeks til C/Section date. I'm an RN and work night shift in home care. It's a great job, but the family and I sat down and talked last week and we'd all be more comfortable if I go on leave a month earlier than I planned, so if the temp replacement works out I'll be done Friday morning until after I have the baby. It's hard on me right now. Do you have yahoo or msn IM?

luckymlo · #7 (**permalink**) 03-25-2007, 10:28 PM

Wow! 7 weeks to go....right on. I can't imagine how excited and nervous I'm going to get when I get closer. I'm planning a regular birth. Have you had a C sec. before. This is 3rd child right? I get it from your 2 pictures of your adorable kids. I do have messenger - marilopez18@yahoo.com, my msn is the same, but ends with hotmail.com.

killiangirl · #8 (**permalink**) 03-26-2007, 01:14 PM

Hello maricruz and welcome. I know all the emotions are running high. I'm in the same boat. i will be giving the baby his last name although my son and a few friends are against it. I'd say as long as he is good to the baby and is cool with you then don't be so hard on him. I'm July 17th and my baby daddy has abandoned us, but I'd give him a second chance. With his son i mean not with me LOL.

crazybaseballmom · #9 (**permalink**) 03-26-2007, 03:59 PM

If he is a good guy and wants to be involved in your childs life I would definitely let him.

As for the last name....I would give him your last name. I made the mistake of giving my twins their dads last name. I SOOO regret it. My oldest has my last name and it would have been so much easier for me and the kids for them to have my last name. I really thought their dad was going to stick around and be a dad....HA joke on me....he hasnt seen them in 3 years.....now they are stuck with a name of a man they dont even know.

whatprincesswants · #10 (**permalink**) 03-26-2007, 05:42 PM

First of all welcome to the board. I think the answer to your question is that it all depends on the kind of man he is. If he is a good person but you just don't intend to have a romantic relationship with him, then he may be good for the child. But if he is like my BF (baby's father) or some of the other ladies on here's babies fathers then it be best left alone. Also don't be so hard on yourself. We all make mistakes. I'm 24 ad I willingly conceived a child with a person I knew was all wrong. At times I've felt so bad about it that I have cried for my son. I'm glad that you chose to give life to your baby. I know you are feeling lonely now, but your child will give YOU life in so many ways once he/she is here.

whatprincesswants · #11 (**permalink**) 03-26-2007, 05:46 PM

Oh and as for the name thing, I did give my son his dad's last name trying to be nice, with my last name as a second middle name. But I am going to chane it to a hyphenated last name instead as he has done very very little for me or my son since the second half of my pregnancy. That way, if things continue like they are his last name can be dropped completely, and as I don't plan to marry ( if it happens it happens) he can have my last name.

little_oceans_mum · #12 (**permalink**) 03-26-2007, 07:27 PM

Maricruz!
You know I went through a similar situation. I got pg, NOT planned, with a guy who is the BIGGEST loser (Well not the biggest I must have seen something in him!

) THEN ontop of that I had to fight with the decision of keeping or giving up my baby to heaven...SO glad I choose option #1!! I opted to give O my last name, cause her Daddy wasn't/isn't fit to be a father and I like my last name better

!!!
I think it's totally up to you and don't let anyone push you into a certain choice.

! WELCOME to the board again!!

luckymlo · #13 (**permalink**) 03-31-2007, 12:06 AM

Thank you guys for your opinions. I do think that it is best to give my son my last name. My BF(baby's father) is not a bad person, he on the other hand does want to take part in everything and wants me to keep him informed of everything, which I have told him to just leave me alone and that I will not keep him informed. I just hold such a big grudge on him because he knew I was not taking care of myself, and so one day he decided to not use protection and now I'm here in this situation, having a baby from someone I don't feel anything for. He's very happy, he's having a baby with the person he loves, "so he says." That's why it was very easy for him to offer me to get married, which I refused right away.

Anyhow, that you all for your suggestions. I do feel lonely and it sucks

-Maricruz

goldenrose222003 · #14 (**permalink**) 03-31-2007, 02:44 AM

That was a really cruel thing for him to do in order to get what he wants.