Hi,
Maybe i'm in the wrong place, but i'm not sure where i should be looking. I'm not a mom yet, and i guess all of you are. I am in the situation of being single and trying to get pregnant. I'm really alone, and want someone who can relate to what i'm going thru. On all the other groups i've looked into, they keep going on and on about dh and how supportive he is. I know i won't have that at any point. But that doesn't change my overwhelming desire to have a baby.

If there is somewhere more appropriate, could someone point the way? Or is it ok to stay here and get advice before i get to the preg. stage of things?

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did you check on the baby dust baords? you can post here but it is pretty slow. I check in all the time though...

can I ask, how are you going about ttc being single?

Hi,

I'm totally new here so please bare with me. I am in a similar situation, although I am not yet actively tryingto get pregnant, I am in the planning stages. I too will check the TTC boards, but I think it is important to at least lurk on this board to get the perspective of woman who are single moms (not that I don't know plenty in my own life.)

I would really like support in this situation too, though, because I think it is something that isn't talked about much.

Hope to hear from you all soon.

Lo

Hi!

not many if any people post here... but sure yeah

Yes, it is slow here, but we could always speed things up.

As to how i am ttc while single: hit or miss with a lot of aggrivation.

I am currently looking into anon. donor, and may have things set up for next cycle. I think i've missed this cycle

[if i'm not already pg. my ticker doesn't help with showing what's actually going on. i've had 26 days of high temps with 1 maybe +hpt, but a -HCG ].

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I would maybe go in and get a blood test done if AF isn't showing up....

I was jsut surious if your were TTC with a partner and yrou single not married or what.

Can I ask, though honestly why do you want to have a baby? alone?

I don't know if i had AF or not. I had 3 days of bleeding, but my temps only dipped for the 1 day and then went back up. Don't know if that was really af.

About my situation, i have a sometimes partner who is not a sig.Other, and is currently being really annoying.

""Can I ask, though honestly why do you want to have a baby? alone?""

That is actually 2 questions with answers that are worlds apart. Why do i want to have a baby?!!!! I have always wanted kids, but i was stupid enough to keep waiting around for a husband. I am 37, still with no potential mate, and i CAN NOT wait any longer. My mother died last summer, and it finally hit me that i just can't keep thinking about it. I have to DO something about it.

I would really REALLY love to have a man who is willing to stick around and be a father to my baby. But no one has given the slightest indication of interest. No indication of a man wanting to stick around even without the idea of a baby. When i first met my current partner, he asked me why on earth i wasn't married or have a steady boyfriend! (notice that he hasn't become either of those)

I'm sorry about the rant, but you hit on a really sensitive topic. I want a baby so badly that it is killing me, and i will do anything to be pregnant. I just want what every woman should be able to have, and so many take for granted.

ok, it's safe to take the cotten out of your ears now, and come out from hiding.

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So why not consider adoption? or things like that? just curious..

and when you start seeing a guy, how soon are you telling them you want kid/s? maybe your dong it too soon and scaring them?

as "stereotypical" or "closed minded" as it may sound, hearing that you are 37 and trying to go it alone is a bit more comforting. I see alot of young girls that want to get pregnant for all the wrong reasons...

Are you working with a doctor with this? considering your age that woudl make you a high risk pregnancy as it is, and could case "delays" with getting pregnant....

but I would say if you just spotted rather then actual bleeding you could be. I would get a blood test at the doctors office just to double check...

Hi, just popped into this board by accident. But I am 38 and a single mom. Madison was born on 7/29/04. And it is VERY difficult to be a single mom, but I don't regret it at all. Maddie's father is in the picture, her picture, not mine. He wants to take an active role in her life, I feel he will get bored with it after a while, but who knows. Understand that no matter what happens you are the only one there. If the baby screams for hours, you can't pass it along to a partner so you can get some sleep, doesn't matter you are the only one there , that baby is counting totally on you! When that baby smiles that smile for the first time, or does something new and wonderful, you are the only one there to experience the joy, all alone. I'm not trying to scare you but prepare you for how it'll be. And the age thing, I was pregnant at 37 (turned 38 soon after) and I'll tell you it takes a toll on the older body. But if you really want a baby I would say to go for it. It is the most undescribable joy you will ever experience. I never wanted kids, Maddie was a total accident but the first time I heard her heartbeat that was it for me, She had my heart in her hands and I wouldn't undo it for anything in the world.

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SHelli Your baby is just precious!!!!

and eveyrthing you have said is right.... it is hard to go it alone... very hard. I enver palnned it this way, was married and everything. but this is how it worked out. i dont' regret Lillyan or this little baby that is coming soon, but I do regreat being alone soem days.... especailly since DA(dumb ***) left out and he is missing out, and really the kids are missing out on knowing their dad. kwim?

But to each there own...

To answer your questions, Rochelle, i have never yet told a guy that i wanted to have a baby. If he's not willing to stick around for just me, then he sure wouldn't want a baby added to that. (big sigh, men!) I could try to adopt, but i don't know that i would qualify. Also, unless i know for certain that i can not have a baby, i am going to try. I have just started working with a RE for this cycle (yea, all that waiting finally came to an end!!) If fact, in a 1/2 hr, i am going in for an IUI.


Shelli, thanks for telling me about your situation. I do know that it will be hard. And even if i didn't, i've had more than enough people go out of their way to tell me. ( ) But i also know that it will be worth it. Madison is beautiful. I had a m/c the end of last year, but was due about the same time as her birthdate. I'm planning ( ) on being a mom shortly after i turn 38 as well.

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I wish you luck.... Although I would think if you can afford a fertility doctor you would be approved for an adoption...

but I dont' get how are you going baout this if you are single? dont' you need a sperm donor? are you doing jsut that using a donor or????????? I ask because well quite honestly children deserve a father, no matter how badly you wan them or love them they will still be missing out. I am speaking as a BTDT single mom

Being one that is living it, I will not advocate other women to go out and "get pregnant" simply because there clock is a ticking away. I feel that God has plans for all of us and well if you can't get pregnant on your own maybe your not meant to get pregnant, adopt, be a great aunty...... oh well I guess that is my own soap box....

hope you continue to check in with us

I don't think i can continue here an longer. I keep being told about God's "plan". If my life so far has been following his "plan", then all i can feel is hatred. It was his "plan" to give me to parents who used me as a punching bag. It was his "plan" that i was raped when i was 6 1/2. It was his "plan" that my little brother was killed when he was in his early 20's. I don't care what else he may have "planned" for me. I have only this 1 life, and although it's not possible for someone to love me, at least i can give my love to someone.

I'm sorry, but i can't keep hearing the same things. I'm not going out of my way to find more people who will tell me how selfish and cruel i am for wanting to have a child.

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Ummmm.....wow. The drama that ensues......