How rude!

Umberlee · #1 (**permalink**) 03-22-2009, 12:55 AM

What is the most rude thing said to you as a pregnant woman?

On the "due in October" board I'm on now, one poster is pregnant with her tenth child. She posted an announcement on her Facebook and one of her "friends" actually posted, "You have heard of the pill or condoms, haven't you?" Whaaaa?

Wondering if any of you have stories here--the topic is inherently going to favor "BTDT" mamas. I know some women are sensitive about comments that have to do with how "huge" they're getting or whatnot...I don't mind that comment but have a couple others (questions actually) that really irk me.

One, and I don't get this so much anymore, is this. When I was 23 I had three kids. I had my first when I was 21, my next when I was 22, and my last when I was 23. Stairstep kids. So when it would come up in conversation how old I was and how many kids I had, I would often get a comment like, "Geez, how old were you when you started having them?" This bothered me mostly because if I had been a teen mother or whatnot I would have been horribly embarrassed by the question. I was embarrassed anyway even though my answer of 21 is "socially acceptable." Incredibly rude.

But the MOST rude comment, and one I am really dreading this time around, is this one: "Do your kids all have the same dad?" WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU ASK ANYONE THAT QUESTION??? I've always wanted to snap, "None of your damn business" but in the past I would just let out a weak, "Um, yes." And once again, I felt embarrassed thinking, "What would be going through their mind if I answered no?" However, now that I'm remarried and having my first child with my now-husband, I am trying to figure out how to answer this question, if it comes up. I am afraid it will since I have literally been asked this by at least three or four different people, sometimes total strangers (a nice-seeming older guy I struck up a conversation with at the laundromat when I was obviously pregnant), and the last time I was asked this question was about three weeks ago on an errand with someone from work (who didn't know I was pregnant, was just asking about the kids she knows I have). I want to respond with, "Why on earth would you ask someone that?" and I might just be p.o.'d enough if someone asks to say it. Who knows.

Anyway...rude questions, rude comments...share 'em.