random thoughts today

I am so hungry all the time, I eat and still feel like I am starving! Maybe the baby is going through a growth spurt? I hope so I want a nice big healthy baby in June!!
How can I be in such a great mood yet be able to snap at anyone without realizing what I am doing? DH thinks I am cranky today but actually I feel quite happy, but he just makes me snap sometimes.
I am scared for my u/s next fri (feb 1) I don't really care what the gender of the baby is as long as it is healthy but the more I think about it the more I want a girl because I believe that all the babies that I lost were boys and the one boy that I was able to give birth to was born with multiple CHD's. Now don't get me wrong I love my Xander with all my heart but I just don't think I could handle having two babies with problems! It is all I can handle with one!! So my logic (althogh prego logic) says that if I have a boy I have more of a chance of having an unhealthy baby rather than if I were prego with a girl then she would be fine. Not true of coarse but that is how I feel and can't get over the fear of having another boy with problems!