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a few childhood memories

We had a big heater in the livingroom that we could and did sit on. I remember me sitting on it. Judi was sitting on the chair beside it.
I had my feet resting on the arm of the chair.
We were argueing about what to name our new puppy.
I got mad at her and started kicking her in the chest.
Mom came in the room mad and sent Judi to our room. I remember feeling really badly about that, but of course I never did tell mom that it was my fault.


I wonder how old I was when we moved into the projects. I really don't have many memories in that house with Judi in them.
I know that she ran away from home alot w hen I was young and spent time time living with Linda, Beve, Patty and Sue, so I am sure that, that had a lot to do with it.
I remember always being so scared. I am still scared. when I was a kid, a pretty old kid I couldn't go to the bathroom alone. I sucked my thumb and slept with my mom until the summer before entering middle school.
I remember that mom had a boyfriend for a few years of my childhood. I was so desperate for a father. I wanted her to marry him so badly. I never knew why he quit coming around until I was older. I found out that his daugher called mom and told her t hat he had sexually abused her when they were kids. Looking back now I do see what a loser he was. He wouldn't have made good father material.


I was not only a scared little girl, I was also such a lonely little girl. I was so shy making friends was very hard for me.