Hi! I'm really just a lurker on this board, but your post caught my eye.

I'm sorry you're going through this!! I went through the same thing with my 2nd pregnancy. It was NOT FUN!!! In fact, it was miserable. The most miserable time of my life.

I really wish I had some magical words of wisdom. I don't. I just really wanted to let you know that you aren't alone.

He could be acting that way for any number of reasons. He could be scared, mad, he might be thinking of you in a different way (now that you're carrying his child), he might be scared to have sex with you (men have many strange thoughts when their wife is pregnant!), he could be cheating, he might just need time to adjust, he might not know what's expected of him or what to say.

All that being said, he needs to accept it, deal with it, and be there for you and the baby.

Just keep trying to talk to him. He might resist, but keep trying. Ask him to attend some marriage counseling with you. Tell him how you are feeling. Be open and honest with him and ask him how he's feeling. If he talks, really really listen to him.

Some tips I learned from my own marriage counseling...if he starts to talk (or if you're arguing) never say "You do this" and "You do that". Instead say "I feel that you do this" and "it upsets me when you do that." Make your statements about you and how you feel. Don't accuse or attack. When he talks, let him finish his sentence, listen and hear him, and then rephrase and repeat it back to him so that he knows you get it. "So, you're saying that you're scared because this was unexpected." Something like that.

I KNOW that you feel like YOU aren't the one who needs to make the effort. I know, I've been there. But to save your marriage, that's sometimes what it takes.

Good luck to you!!!!