I am really sorry to hear that this has been such an issue for you guys and reading your post entirely tore my heart out of my chest. I personally would not be able to listen to my child cry for even one minute let alone 5 or 15.

Dh does not have "nerves of steel" but he is simply not hardwired to tune into this child in the way that you, his mother is. Perhaps he can handle it better, but he didn't carry that child inside of him for months and bond to it in the same way. You respond to your baby because your are biologically designed to. I personally find it heartwrenching to hear that you had to be restrained from your baby when you were feeling such angst and your baby was needing you. Why should you both suffer needlessly? It doesn't make sense to me, but then again, I am not a CIO mom.

Many babies who are subjected to CIO do vomit. Babies have a very loose sphincter at the base of the stomach and the pressure of crying hard can cause stomach contents to come back up. Imagine how hard you would have to cry in order to cause yourself to vomit - I've been there a few times when I've cried hysterically about one thing or another. With babies it just happens a little easier, but this is not atypical. I am glad you caught it so that you could fix it and dry him up.

"I've heard some babies can choke and die when they spit up"

Well yes, they can. I am sure it is not common, but they can aspirate (inhale) the vomit and gag/choke.

"I don't know if I can take anouther night of this. It is pure torture"

I would not be able to do this so I can relate. It does sound like torture from all angles.