I guess I've never grown up with those "rules".
My mom was 17 when she had me, 16 when she got pregnant. My mom was 3 mo pregnant with me and married my 18yo father. They struggled every year for a while but my mom was a SAHM until we all entered school then she worked while we were in school and was always home in time to greet us. They ended up having 6 kids in the end.
I always wanted kids. When I was 13 I wanted a baby. I never acted upon it and have only been with one man (my husband of course). I was 20 when I met him 21 when we married and 21 when we became pregnant and 22 when we had our first child, and this was just a short 7 years ago.
Every year since our marriage I have been pregnant at some point or another. We currently have 5 beautiful children, and are planning on at least one more if not 3 more.
We don't own a house, we aren't financially stable, and we take things one day at a time. I homeschool so I won't be going back to work unless DH becomes a SAHD. I've never felt more blessed. We've never had to struggle with providing the basic necessities for our children. They have more clothes than I know what to do with and our cupboards are always overflowing. We are the "popular" house int he neighborhood and it's not because of money
. The kids in the neighborhood comeover so I can read to them! SOmetimes they like sitting in on one of the kids homeschooling lessons or they like to watch me bake brownies or even cook dinner. (it's been odd around here lately)
I've just never grown up thinking about the rules you've talked about, but I know them all too well. I don't understand them in the least. My religion has told us
not to delay having children for all of those exact reasons you stated Lisa, so maybe that is why I feel differently. Even now in the news you hear about the increasing age of mothers and the complications that go along with their choices. Some not knowing about the effects or perimenopause that can happen as early as one's twenties. The devestating effects of some birth controls that some women were on and can't reverse. In the end the $$$ that these couples saved up inorder to be prepared to have a family is thus spent on many fertility tretments pretty much leaving them right back where they started 10 years earlier
I think families are the most important thing we have. I really do want a large family and I pretty much have that. Money was never an issue and money and things have always worked out for us even when we thought they wouldn't. Somehow priorities change and you just don't think about your needs and wants anymore. You go ahead and get that $25 package of diapers without so much as a wince and cringe at the thought of buying a $20 bra for yourself
I will say though that I agree with you on that age thing. I am just rounding that corner of age 30 {{gasp}} and there are many a days where I still feel like a teenager and like I have absolutely no clue as to what I am doing. I always used to think adults knew what they were doing but being one has taught me that they are just winging it like the rest of us. I struggle with 'should I scold the neighbor kids who are fighting outside my door or let them handle things on their own?' (not physically but verbally fighting) I worry about stupid lawsuits because this country is so greedy and quick to blame others.
Well I don't know much, and I think I am rambling now, LOL